Interview With Jackelyn Santana


Welcome back to another December issue of my biweekly interview series. Today I’m interviewing the gracious and beautiful Jackelyn Santana who was recently married. She has a faith based blog here: Faith Walking Hebrews 11:1. She describes her blog using the Hebrews 1:11 Bible Verse: “Now Faith Is The Assurance of Things Hoped For, The Conviction of things Not Seen.”


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Jackelyn Santana

1. Jackelyn, Please Tell Us About Yourself?

My name is Jackelyn Santana, I am from Miami, FL, and my family is of Cuban descent.I am a child of God and passionate about my faith. I LOVE reading, blogging, and spending time with my family.  I was married on November 11, 2016 and  I am a mother to an amazing six-year-old and a stepmother to two beautiful young ladies.

This year has been full of blessings. To emotionally prepare myself for our marriage, I spent the year analyzing myself and I’m finally at a place where I can embrace my authenticity. I spent a good portion of my life internalizing my pain, wearing masks to cope, and believing something was wrong because I didn’t have everything as it seemed everyone around me had.

Having this frame of mind enslaved me. There wasn’t anything wrong with what I was facing, but because there’s a stigma associated with imperfection and emotional struggle, I thought it was a ‘ME’ problem. I didn’t realize the truth, my problems were natural and universal.

As I began opening up and peeling off the layers I was hiding under, I discovered more and more people who hid there pain as I was doing. We strengthened each other, helped each other heal, celebrated our spiritual growth, and learned to love ourselves no matter where we are in life.

The most beautiful thing I’ve witnessed is a group of hopeless lost souls coming together and loving each other back to life. We found a reason to smile again. This world is in such need of healing. I would love nothing more than to help spread love and healing wherever I go in my life.


” As I began opening up and peeling off the layers I was hiding under, I discovered more and more  people who hid there pain as I was doing. We strengthened each other, helped each other heal, celebrated our spiritual growth, and learned to love ourselves no matter where we are in life.” – Jackelyn Santana


2. When Did You Begin Blogging? What Does Blogging and Writing Mean To You?

I started blogging about four months ago July 20, 2016 to be exact. Blogging means everything to me! It’s liberated me. I’m free!! The more I write about things, the less ashamed I am of what I’ve faced. With each post I’ve removed the chains of emotions and experiences I kept a secret. These emotions and experiences have lost power over me.

This has allowed me to acknowledge and celebrate my spiritual growth. I enjoy interacting with other bloggers. Blogging also gives me an inside view of my soul. Sometimes I’m shocked when I read older posts because when I wrote, I let the words flow from my soul and they expressed things I wouldn’t voice out loud.


3. Where Do You Find Your Inspiration and Motivation To Write?

I am inspired by my faith and other bloggers. I began blogging about one-year ago, but I didn’t think I could write posts people would want to read. I’m better at public speaking than I am at writing. A co-worker of mine kept pushing me to write. I would share advice with her and she would nudge me to put it on paper. I finally decided to test the waters by submitting a guest post on Proverbs 31 Women.

They approved my guest post one-month later and I was shocked and honored.  I started writing away on my blog often. My faith in God changed my life, it wasn’t until I understood my faith better that I was able to apply its principles to my life. In the past few years I’ve uncovered so much richness I was missing out on because I didn’t study my beliefs. It’s become a way of life for me and I want to help others learn about Jesus in practical terms.

Many times when we think of the Bible we think of a standard which is too high for most of us to reach. The Bible comes across as something only ‘Holy’ people read. Or, we become intimidated by it because we find it unrelatable since The Bible was written many moons ago and times have changed.

These ideas of Christianity couldn’t be further from the truth. We need to find the right tools to break down barriers from reading God’s Word, The Bible, and help others understand faith in simpler terms. Believing in Jesus can guide us towards love and happiness. Once we understand the basics, our soul will keep searching for more – our hearts will be “homing our Heavenly home,” if you will, and we will grow spiritually.

By identifying with examples from the stories in The Bible, we can understand our obstacles are not too much, our lives can be molded in a way which allows us to serve both God, our families, and friends because they’re all related.

God acknowledges our need for connection and sent his son Jesus not only so that we could be saved, but so we could identify with Jesus and strive to imitate His way of life. As a woman, fiancee, and mother, I have been able to love more purely and unconditionally through The Bible’s teachings, making them a way of life.

Reflecting on the dark moments I’ve faced, I see how fine the line between good and evil can be — being saved or being lost; I want to help others be saved as I am saved through Jesus’s death and resurrection. 


“My faith in God changed my life, it wasn’t until I understood my faith better that I was able to apply its principles to my life. In the past few years I’ve uncovered so much richness I was missing out on because I didn’t study my beliefs.’ – Jackelyn Santana


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Jackelyn Santana

4. When Do You Like to Write and Do You Have Any Current Special Writing Projects?

There isn’t a time of day that inspires me the most. I write whenever my heart moves me to write. As of today I’m only blogging. My passion and dream is to help others. Perhaps join /create a traveling retreat group, or participate in spiritual workshops. This is a concept similar to a ‘Women of Faith’ tour, but on a smaller more personal level.

There would be one to one interaction, healing exercises, and honest group talk. I would love to help others come out of their shells and be saved through faith in Jesus and God as I was. My healing is made possible through God and meeting an amazing group of women in my Emmaus Ministry who were transparent about their struggles and shared tips on overcoming the obstacles of life.


5. Are You Planning on Publishing Any Written Work in The Future?

I have not published anything. Perhaps later in life I will be presented the opportunity to do so, or I will submit writing drafts. With only four-months of blogging under my belt I’m focusing on identifying my writing voice, interacting with others through my writing, and improving my writing skills which are at a novice level. I would also like to study theology and I think it would further advance my writing.


“My healing is made possible through God and meeting an amazing group of women in my Emmaus Ministry who were transparent about their struggles and shared tips on overcoming the obstacles of life.”


6. What Is Your Writing Process Like?

I sit in front of my laptop or a notepad and I pray, relax, and set my soul free to express itself. When an idea pops into my mind I write it down either on my phone’s notepad, or sticky notes. I may begin draft posts that I revisit at a later time when I can give my writing undivided attention. I have about fourteen draft posts which I’ve begun and I’m saving for the future blog posts.

When I first started blogging I would write and post instantly. I’ve learned to slow down and process topics, allowing my mind to continue digging for information. I will officially post my writing after I have looked at every angle.


7. Do You Have Any Helpful Advice for Other Writers Starting Out?

Write about topics you are passionate about. It feels great to do what you love. I love what I write about and it’s how I live my life. If you’re on the fence about writing I would suggest you take a leap of faith and see what comes from this desire.

WordPress has a wonderful community of bloggers and this community helps you grow as a writer. Don’t write posts for the sake of increasing traffic and followers, write on topics you enjoy writing about.  


8. Is There Anything Else You Would Like To Share Pertinent to Yourself or Your Writing?

I am God’s creation, I am human, I am imperfect, and I am meant to depend on God. Read this post to learn more about me.


9. Please Share With Us Some Of Your Favorite Blog Posts:

Slogging Through The Tears

By Jackelyn Santana

*****

“Sensitive people are the most genuine and honest people you will ever meet. There is nothing they won’t tell you about themselves if they trust your kindness. However, the moment you betray them, reject them or devalue them, they become the worse type of person. Unfortunately, they end up hurting themselves in the long run. They don’t want to hurt other people. It is against their very nature.  They want to make amends and undo the wrong they did. Their life is a wave of  highs and lows. They live with guilt and constant pain over unresolved situations and misunderstandings.  They are tortured souls that are not able to live with hatred or being hated. This type of person needs  the most love anyone can give them because their soul has been constantly bruised by others. However, despite the tragedy of what they have to go through in life, they remain the most compassionate people worth knowing, and the ones that often become activists for the broken hearted, forgotten and the misunderstood. They are angels with broken wings that only fly when loved.” –Shannon L. Alder

 *****

I am on an emotional roller coaster ride.

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I will not try to deny it, this is who I am, sensitivity and all. I wear my sensitivity as a badge of honor, although throughout life I have been ridiculed or further wounded because of it. I cannot control the sensitive nature of my heart. I may pretend something has not stabbed or wounded me, but more likely than not this is not the case.

For many years I have tried to harden myself, hoping that I would become immune to the blows of life, and the harsh words received from those I hold with high esteem. Despite my efforts, my sensitive nature is unchanged.

My sensitive nature is misunderstood.

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Those closest to me believe they understand me and my motives. They believe they can read between the lines. Many dare to correct me when I express my intentions and motives, determined their interpretation of my position is correct. My hard and serious exterior denies me the right to ever be recognized as a victim, although, my heart tells me otherwise. Many times I find myself confused, doubting my heart, thinking that there is something severely wrong because I’m always wrong and never right about my own feelings. Maybe I am bad at the core?

One Of My Favorite Bible Verses:

“For what I am doing, I do not understand; for I am not practicing what I would like to do, but I am doing the very thing I hate.”  Romans 7:15

broken-heartIn my case, I do not understand why I continue to love and care the way I do. I know better, yet I cannot help it. I continue to express my vulnerabilities to those I care about in hopes that I will be understood. The more I explain myself, the further away I get from MY truth, and the closer I get to shedding unfavorable light on myself. I allow the fighter in me to get the best of me when I feel taken advantage of. This without a doubt, is used against me as I fail to be consistent, giving in to my human frailty. I can only be silent for so long without jumping into protective mode. I can only shed so many tears without lashing out. The cruelty I spew is the cruelty I have learned through life, it is not the natural nature of my heart. I would never purposely provoke tears from anyone, not even those who have hurt me profoundly. Yet sometimes acting in this manner is the only way I can get someone to listen to my voice and believe my truth. I am neither too proud to extend an apology when deserved and make amends with those I’ve offended. My truest desire is to maintain peace.

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I am not taken seriously in my tender moments; my tenderness is taken for granted. The world demands yet resents my tenderness. Should a loved one offend me, my tenderness is an inconvenience because my tears take away from focusing on the “root” of the problem, and I am forced to slog against the tears. Should I act sternly with others, not allowing my emotions to flinch, I’m accused of being cold and harsh. The combination of my emotions is never seen as right.

It seems my sensitivity is to be used at the convenience of others. I can never be me. I’m never entitled to the beauty of my emotions. My view of my emotions is brushed off because I am overly sensitive. Yet, I cannot label the world as overly cruel, overly angry, or overly unforgiving.

I read once that instead of numbing our pain we need to identify the source of our pain and work on the problem instead of the symptom. For example, we may have a headache because we are dehydrated, hungry, or stressed. We should work on fixing those issues rather than silencing the headache calling out for attention.

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The same goes for my tears. My tears, the ‘water works’ as they’ve been called, are not crocodile tears. It’s not an act or an attempt to manipulate; these statements couldn’t be further from the truth. My tears are indicators that my soul is experiencing pain, something is hurting me. To stop my pain at it’s root I need to either freeze my heart (which I have failed to accomplish) or excuse myself from the undesirable situation until I’m emotionally ready. This I can rarely accomplish without ridicule that I cannot work through a topic, without being accused of being overly dramatic.

I am always apologizing, but rarely entitled to an apology when hurt because my over-sensitivity is what causes the pain, not the actions or words of others.

When is my sensitive nature ever right for me!?

People say my tears and sensitive nature take away from the moment. I have slogged away for a good portion of my life to hide these parts of myself. I keep my tears a secret and am ashamed of my weakness.

As an adult, I find that my sensitive nature and heart are not the problem. The problem is the lack of sensitivity in the world. It’s not the compassionate who are the problem; a lack of empathy is the problem!  I will continue to embrace my sensitivity, tears and all. I do not lose hope there are more sensitive people out there. I won’t (and truthfully can’t) harden myself and lose hope because I find the world to be cruel and unloving. I am who I am. I am transparent.My anger is pain masked with anger. It’s sadness for being the recipient of a pain I would never wish to inflict on others. It’s a betrayal I never foresaw. It’s the second opportunity no one else would’ve extended, yet I’ve already extended a third to my offender while knowing how the situation will likely end. It’s fighting the urge to assume the worst in others. It’s the unconditional love I am willing to give which is rarely cashed in.

It’s the product of a broken heart living in a broken world that is trying to break the best in me.

  “Highly sensitive people are too often perceived as weaklings or damaged goods. To feel intensely is not a symptom of weakness, it is the trademark of the truly alive and compassionate. It is not the empath who is broken, it is society that has become dysfunctional and emotionally disabled. There is no shame in expressing your authentic feelings. Those who are at times described as being a “hot mess” or having “too many issues” are the very fabric of what keeps the dream alive for a more caring, humane world. Never be ashamed to let your tears shine a light in this world.” – Anthon St. Maarten

Slog

*****


Here Are More of Jackelyn’s Posts:


Thank you so much Jackelyn for agreeing to be interviewed. I am thrilled to find out so much about you and hope your struggles in life have become easier to handle through your faith. I hope you have more peaceful moments, than times which stress you out. Here is one more link to Jackelyn’s BlogFaith Walking Hebrews 11:1


Thanks for reading! If you would like to answer some interview questions about writing/blogging/poetry and your unique perspective and process on writing, I would encourage you to reach-out to me on my Contact Page. I would love to have you featured as a biweekly interviewee. See you in two-weeks!


©Mandibelle16. (2016) All Rights Reserved.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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Winter 2016/2017 Beauty Haul: Part One


Good Afternoon everyone. I’m back with some of my favourite beauty products I’ve tried since my Fall Beauty Haul. I hope you like the products and find some you can incorporate into your own beauty routine.


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Benefit Cosmetics: Browvo Conditioning Primer (www.sephora.ca) – $36.00 CAN

1.Benefit Cosmetics: Browvo! Conditioning Primer – Nutrient Rich Primer for Fuller-Looking Brows –  (1.0 mL) – http://www.sephora.ca – $36.00 CAN

This wasn’t a product I went out and bought, but I received the full-sized product with a coupon code from Sephora. Its a product part of Benefit’s recently revamped brow line since brows have become a big deal these past two-years where makeup is concerned.

I haven’t used this product long, only a week, but I wanted to include it in the Beauty Haul. So far I enjoy the product and it makes my brows feel soft. You don’t have to wear other brow products on top of it. If you want, you can wear Browvo alone. Basically, Browvo’s a pen and you squeeze some of the conditioning product out. There is a soft rubber comb you can use to brush it on your eyebrows.

The biggest feature I think of this is product, is that it is conditioning so if you have sparse brows, this makes them appear “fuller, thicker, and healthier.” Browvo is a “nutrient rich” conditioning formula with “keratin” and “soy proteins.” These ingredients are known to help brows appear fuller.

For women who have either over-plucked their own brows or gone to places to have their brows waxed and had them waxed and shaped too thin for a long time, Browvo is fantastic product for you to try out. Also if you find the pencil or gel you are filling in your brows with doesn’t last, Browvo is a brow primer and will aid you in keeping your brow makeup in place.

My brows have always been on the fuller side so even though my brows feel nice when I put Browvo on, it’s not a product I would purchase because I don’t think its a product marketed to me but to women who have sparser brows. If I needed primer on my brows I would use my usual face primer which is POREfessional primer from Benefit.


2. Benefit Cosmetics: ka-Brow- Cream Gel Eyebrow Colour with Brush (1.0 g) -www.sephora.ca – $30.00 CAN

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Benefit Cosmetics: ka-Brow Cream Gel Brown Colour with Brush -www.spehora.ca – $30.00 CAN

On a different makeup order, I received a full-sized sample of Benefit’s of ka-Brow. I’ve been using it a few weeks and its a great product actually. Ka-Brow is a cream gel product you use to fill in your eyebrows, instead of a pencil or other brow products. I’ve never used a gel product on my eyebrows, so I was eager to try  ka-Brow out.

The lid comes of this product and you pull off the brush as well, to dip it into the brow gel container which is on the bottom of the product as you can see. It can be difficult to tell at first, how much of the gel you need to use to fill in your eyebrows. I found a little ka-Brow goes a long way. The brush is tiny and it’s easy to fill in your brow more naturally, with tiny strokes. Or to make your brows look more defined by using thicker swipes of ka-Brow on your eye brows.

The product promises to “fill,” “sculpt,” and “define brows.” You can build it from a “natural” look to a more “dramatic” one quite easily with ka-Brow as I mentioned. Ka-brow is also Waterproof and lasts 24 Hours.

I had never considered using a gel product such as ka-Brow to fill in my brows.I am quite happy to use a brow pencil which is soft but not too soft. I find  despite using ka- Brow, I require Benefit’s blond brow gel over top to set the product.

I’m undecided about using ka-Brow over a pencil such as an Anastasia Brow Pencil I’d been using before trying this product. Ka-Brow can accidentally be put on quite too thick and I don’t know how long it lasts compared to a brow pencil. A good brow pencil such as one from Anastasia, lasts me three-months. So I’ll see if this product lasts another couple of months.

There is nothing wrong with ka-Brow. It works well, and I chose the shade o1 Platinum for blonds and the colour is perfect; however, it’s up to you what products you prefer to use on your eyebrows and how much you can afford to spend on a brow product for how long it lasts.  I haven’t decided if I like this product enough to buy it again.


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L’Oreal Voluminous Butterfly INTENZA Waterproof Mascara -(www.ulta.com) – $8.99 US or at Shoppers Drug Mart $8.99 CAN on Sale.

3. L’Oreal Butterfly INTENZA Waterproof Mascara – Blackest Black 381 – (2.0 mL) – http://www.ulta.com – $8.99 US ( Also bought at Shopper’s Drug Mart for $8.99 CAN)

I admit, I’m a mascara junky. Out of all the products I use, mascara is the one I change the most often. My last one from Make Up Forever, I ended up loving in the end, except that the brush which covered every tiny lash, made mascara go all over my eye area and the mascara didn’t appear to have such a volumizing effect as I was hoping for. So for over top, I bought this L’Oreal mascara from Shoppers Drug Mart and it worked extremely well to use over top the Make Up Forever Mascara and fill out my eyelashes.

I find myself consistently going back to L’Oreal mascaras because they reliably, time and again, have well priced mascaras which do the same job as most mascaras in the $30.oo to $40.00 range.

For L’Oreal you are only paying around $10 CAN for their mascara. It’s a shame when you buy an expensive mascara and hate it. But if you don’t like a cheaper mascara it isn’t such a big deal if it doesn’t work out. The only difference I can say between say L’Oreal mascaras and expensive mascaras such as Dior, is that mascaras such as Dior, have fantastic black or brown colour pigment.

However, I do tend to receive many beauty samples, especially in mascara. I will try out a new mascaras a sample from a more expensive brand, and put the L’Oreal over top to set a non-waterproof mascara (because it runs under my eyes) and to add a little extra volume if needed. I completely recommend this L’Oreal mascara and many  other kinds of L’Oreal mascara,  as long as the mascara is waterproolipf.


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Make Up Forever: Artist Plexi-Gloss in 209 Fuchsia – Pink -www.sephora.ca – $24.00 CAN

4. Make Up Forever: Artist Plexi Gloss – 209 Fuschsia Pink (Opaque) – (7 mL) – http://www.sephora.ca – $24.00 CAN

Lately, I find myself becoming more interested in lip products.For most of my twenties, lip gloss or lipstick in a light pink was fine for going out or during the  day. Now I find I enjoy wearing a bit of colour on my lips because you can wear a bold lip and wear hardly any other makeup than a bit of mascara, eyeliner, and concealer.

Usually, I like to wear makeup but every once and a while, if I’m just running quick errands and than going home, I don’t feel like putting all the effort into doing my full makeup routine. My pet peeve about lipsticks and glosses is in a way, the same way  I feel about mascaras: I hate when I buy a more expensive lipstick or gloss and it comes off right away, the first time you have a glass of water. Also, I hate that many lip glosses can be sticky.

This is not the case with Make Up Forever’s Artist Plexi-Gloss. It’s super amazing stuff and you can buy it many colours in a high shine finish or in a shimmer finish. The colour I bought was a Fuchsia Pink and it’s amazing. I’m not huge on bright red lipstick as you know, but this is my trade off. I love wearing this bright shade some days, and it stays on incredibly well through drinking, eating, and whatever else you’re doing. I’m so pleased by how long the colour lasts.

Besides the brilliant colours this Artist Plexi-Gloss has an artist designed foam applicator (a”superflex” tip) which is amazing for applying the gloss and having “precision and control,” while doing it. As well, I enjoy that the Plexi-Gloss is shiny but not super shiny such as many sticky lip glosses or moisturizing lipsticks. Plexi-Gloss is more akin to lipstick with shine, the colour is so intense. I highly recommend this lip product; it is most certainly worth the $24.00 CAN.


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Laneige: Multiberry Yogurt Repairing Mask – For All Skin – http://www.sephora.ca – $33.00 CAN

5. LANEIGE: Multiberry Yogurt Repairing Mask(2.7 Oz) – http://www.sephora.ca – $33.00 CAN

I’ve hardly ever had a problem with dry skin in my entire life. My problem has always been oily skin. Being a couple of years into my thirties, I find my skin is changing a bit. It  has become more dry. The chilly -25 degrees Celsius weather we are experiencing in Alberta, Canada isn’t helping my dry skin either.

Having had troubles with many skin products in the past, I’m always hesitant about different face masks and other brands of skincare. But I’ve been so pleased with a newer brand to Sephora called Laneige. I’ve tried a couple small one or two day samples of their  products. But also with my Sephora points, bought a large sample of Laneige’s Multiberry Yogurt Repairing Mask.

It smells wonderful, a bit as yogurt of course, but also as strawberries. The sample I received which was (0.6 fl.oz), lasted two-months and I’ve been used this moisturizing mask every two-days as directed. This Yogurt Repairing Mask is put it on after using your toner. You leave the mask on for five to ten minutes and then gently rinse it off your face with lukewarm water. After you can apply any other creams or your moisturizers you use to your face.

I wake the next morning after using this Yogurt Repairing Mask and my skin feels soft and hydrated. It’s not dry as my skin has often been feeling lately. I did go and purchase this from Sephora, it was highly worth it.

Laneige’s Multiberry Yogurt Repairing Mask delivers “nutrition” and “antioxidants” deep into skin. It is formulated to “remove dead skin” from the surface of your face. Its unique “fermented yogurt” formula provides “anti-irritation” benefits to the skin. Not to mention, I’ve never once broken out after using this mask the next day or any days after. I’m excited to maybe try other products from Laneige’s skin care line. I most definitively recommend this mask and I think for how long the product lasts, the price is reasonable.


Please stay tuned for Part Two of my Winter 2016/2017 Beauty Haul!


©Mandibelle16. (2016) All Rights Reserved.

#OctPoWriMo – Day 25 –  Alouette – “Insatiable Red”


Day 25 Prompt: Red
“When I was growing up I extremely disliked the color red, not sure if the fact I had red hair had anything to do with it or not. It wasn’t until a few years back that I started to enjoy red and now I love it. I completely embrace red! How about you? Love it? Hate it? Don’t feel anything about it? I have always enjoyed big red barns though, I think it is because my great grandparents lived/owned/worked on their ranch with a big red barn and farmhouse. I loved having family gatherings out there.” 
——–

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http://www.hiddenworldphotos.com

“Red” – Taylor Swift


Too bright hurts my eyes, 👀

Step-back, blinded by —

Red; the colour kindly few like.

Forceful, seductive, 💋

Not for reluctant.

It’s sunsets with the fall of leaves bright. 🌅


Maple trees red sigh,  🍁

And red eyes crying.  😭

Mighty power, red does lend.💰

Most sold lipstick —red; 👄

Classic colour said;

Cadillacs, Mercedes Benz.  🚗


Royal, wealth of land,  👑

Expensive dye’s hand —

Made scarlet; a king’s fine robes. 🔱

Privilege, money. 💰

Repulsive, funny,

Never liked, but on my toes. 👣


Women opt for red

Cooler; warmer red

Men’s own own chosen taste;  💪

Brilliant red, sexy; 💋

Elegant, regal, next. 👑

Amount changes, moods, tastes.


Trashy women in —

Sultry plastic.

Grace of love felt; most fav shoes. 👠 👗

Naughty and nice, 👍

Santa and Christmas; 🎄

Lights saying stop, you’ll lose.


Curious colour,

Loved or hated fleur.

Rose, hibiscus, poinsettias. 🌹

Different meanings,

Red fleurs, never seen; 🌹

Dancers doing flamenco. 💃🏼


For myself I think,

Preference for pink. 💗

A tint of red, more like me.

A bit of lipstick. 💄

If I must wear it.

Sport’s teams, and broken heart’s pleas. 💔


©Mandibelle16.(2016) All Rights Reserved.


#OctPoWriMo – Day 16 – English Sonnet – “Love Your Wife and Her Cooking” #amwriting #poetry


Day 16 Prompt: Savoury 

According to Merriam-Webster dictionary, savory is defined as: a : piquantly pleasant to the mind <a savory triumph>b : morally exemplary c : pleasing to the sense of taste especially by reason of effective seasoning d : pungently flavorful without sweetness.” 

———

 

http://www.williams-sonoma.com

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You say it’s delicious, you haven’t tasted, 

Anything as savoury as this food. 

 Your words need changing, not to be wasted, 

On food of women, snuck in your bedroom. 

——-

I’ll help you understand, I’m not one to be —

Crossed; when you don’t come home I wonder where, 

Who you’ve been with? I cook dinner fancy, 

Your favorite foods, savoury taste, you swear.

——-

But this night has been waiting; I’m scared, 

Tired, always being second, to some whore. 

Eat food and choke; poisoned you’re most aware, 

Should’ve been home; other men me adored. 

——-

Were you ashamed of your own wife you wed?

You cared not for me; fortunes mine –you’re dead. 

——–

©Mandibelle16. (2016) All Rights Reserved. 

Photo Challenge: Nonfiction – Waffles and Spaghetti: Men and Their Boxes #nonfiction #relationship 


Thank you to MindLoveMisery’s Menagerie for hosting this week’s photo challenge prompt. 

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Rob. Woodcox

—–

A popular dating guide I read years ago was called Men are Like Waffles –Woman Like Spaghetti By Bill and Pam Farrel.  Oddly enough this dating guide was first published in 1959 and then republished in 2001. Sometimes the guide is downright old fashioned and other times it gives some extremely wise advise. 

One part which always stuck out for me was the title of the book and why exactly men are like waffles and women like spaghetti. The above image from reminds me of these analogies. 

Just as waffles have all those small squares in them or boxes so do men in how they organize their life. Each area of their life is a box and never shall two boxes meet. A man’s work or his job is one box and his kids maybe another box. His wife and his relationship with her is another box and so is his fixation on fixing old cars or spending time chilling out watching Netflix or the hockey game on TV.

Woman on the other hand, are like spaghetti because everything in their lives is mixed with everything else going on in their lives. Each thing is connected and affects other things. For instance, if a woman is stressed out at work and her boss is riding her tail to finish a project, this might make the woman angry and moody at home because she has to hold it all in at work. Her kids know something is up and stay away from Mom and she feels rejected. 

Suddenly, she needs to clean everything in the house and is making the kids clean up too. Cleaning in this instance, makes her feel better because she is in control and able to accomplish something. At work she feels she cannot accomplish what she needs at the moment. Then Mom is upset at her kids because they are not doing a thorough cleaning job. At home, Mom’s the boss. 

Her husband comes into the great room to see what’s up with all the noise and cleaning on a late week night. He and his wife start talking and she’s mad at him and picking fights over him leaving his laundry on the floor and not texting her back at work today. 

She tells her husband she doesn’t have time to clean up after him, she’s really busy at work and no she can’t come to his work event. She can’t possibly make idol conversation with that weird woman her husband works with and seems to always want to talk to her right now, it would push her over the edge. Disatisfaction at work is effecting her whole life. 

A smart husband would realize something is up and talk his dear wife through things until he hits on the real issue. Or better yet, let his wife talk until she gets down to the real issue. After voicing her feelings, his wife will be happier and more relaxed.

On the other hand, her husband doesn’t understand completely why his wife needs to talk things out and why everything in her life effects everything else. 

His life is in boxes (apparently naked high up in trees) so when the work box gets to stressful, he goes to the box where he can tinker with the car he’s rebuilding. Work doesn’t effect him here, in fact, this box may help the husband think things through or gain perspective on issues he could be having at work or say the fight he had with his wife.

So all you men in your boxes, let your ladies talk it out and if they won’t, encourage them to talk when they’re ready. I know you don’t get this whole talking just because you need to thing, but actually you’re helping your woman find the root of a problem to deal with it. And that makes you a problem solver with a happier life and wife. 

Ladies, let your guy tinker, watch sports, or whatever when he’s stressed. He’s not as vocal as you and he’s thinking things through or giving himself a break from stress. He’s in his box and it’s giving him reprieve from his problem because he’s not in that work box or in another stressful box. When he’s ready he’ll say something, what he’s decided or after a while if he’s not a talker, you can encourage him to talk or outright ask him what’s up. Better not to to be too subtle

So that is the most memorable and important thing I learned from this book. Do you think it’s true in your own life? In anyone’s life? Or is it an outdated model from an old dating guide? 

—–

©Mandibelle16. (2016) All Rights Reserved

Three Line Tales: Life of A Native-American Tribe’s Woman


Thank you to Sonya of Only 100 Words for hosting 3 Line Tales:


tipi's indians
Maher El Aridi

1.The stars are dazzlingly brilliant in the inky-dark sky; through the small circle of space in the top of my families tipi, I feel the warm summer air breathing down on me; tomorrow is another day of rigorous work for the women of our tribe, we tan animal hides, gather fruit and nuts, and smoke our meat into pemmican.


2. The men will be off hunting in the morning; chasing the deer, buffalo, rabbits, foxes, and any animal which will provide us food presently, and in the winter months; the braves bring the animals to the woman and we skin the animal’s of their fur; the men will sell some of our beautiful soft fur to white-man traders; some of the furs we’ll keep for ourselves for in winter, so we won’t freeze to death;


3.When our braves hunt, our tribe prays for the animal spirits and we ask mother-earth to be kind to us and take the animal spirits; though we eek our living from nature, we always give her thanks; sunlight filters through the hole in the tipi and my mother starts a fire;  I aid my mother with the morning meal sighing as smoke obscures the hole in the tipi; there are days I feel, life is only a trap and I will never see the blue-sky.


©Mandibelle16.(2016) All Rights Reserved.

Poem: Free Verse – “Words After Turning Thirty-One” #amwriting #poetry 


http://www.pinterest.com

——–

What do we become as women at thirty-one?

Are we put out to pasture? 
Or are we doing the kicking to the curb? 

Are we like the woman of the 1960’s? 

Childless, no husband, so no value? 

Are we no longer desired? 

Are we spinsters, old-maids, bachelorettes for life? 

Or are do we fit my Uncles words:

“The most beautiful women are in their thirties.” 

Is it just the beginning, or is it the end? 

A last stretch of youth?

Or maybe, a reach for adulthood? 

Where some intelligence kicks in, 

And you’re tired of the lies, 

Meaningful nights; mornings depressed. 

So, you’ll wait for the right kind of guy, 

With the right kind of flaws;

Or maybe you live your own charmed life? 

Happy to be single, confident, relaxed.

Is it coming out of bubble gum and pink clouds? 

Finally not a girl;

But a woman who can impact change? 

Is it refinement and elegance? 

A striving for grace and eloquence? 

Is it realizing there is no Prince Charming? 

No white horse or Disney fairytale? 

Building your own life,

Do you forge it the best you can? 

Is it becoming aware even greater, 

Your teachers in childhood are growing older;

Your most lives won’t be around forever, 

So, you gather their wisdom while you can;

Spend time with them now.

Time steals loved ones; be they young or old.

Is thirty-one when you realize,

You are not impervious to dying at anytime in life? 

Severe fatigue, cancer, lupus, Thyroid troubles, 

Depression, anxiety, car accidents, the flu, MS;

Disease in some form, affects us all, 

Bodies which don’t bounce back as easily;

Requiring movement to maintain fitness,
And junk food, oh you’ll pay for it later! 

Sharing a bottle of vodka, tequila, or wine;

Drinking almost all of it, 

Can this be done anymore, and survived? 

Two glasses of wine or two beers, 

Every once in a while seems alright, 

Or face the two-day hangover regrettfully.

The biggest thing about being thirty-one, 

I’ll never get back years in my twenties, 

Lost in fatigue and mental illness, affects of meds;

They’re fond memories of genuine friends;

Futures, I see possibilities of having.

But someone wise once wrote, at the ages if 15 to 32:

Don’t worry about marriage, kids, or being grown-up;

Just enjoy and learn, explore the world. 

The wanderlust calls to me endlessly, 

A mysterious adventure waiting;

Such planning, such difficulties, such hardship; 

For a fantastic trip; I could barely walk all day, 

Or afford it; but wouldn’t it be worth it? 

To have thousands of foot prints,

To cover my pages, and see it’s okay – life goes how it does.

Thirty-one it’s only begun; an age of aspirations, 

Hopefully, inspirations to write more of;

As numerous as my days in all my years allotted. 

Passion and a life to live, anyway I know how.

Grace of God abounding; encircling profoundly, 

His child, he won’t let stumble long.

He guards with angels, and —

His forever promise of light in the dark; 

As wise JK Rowling wrote through Dumbledore:

“Happiness can be found even in the darkest of times; 

If only one will Remember, to turn on the light.” 
——

©Mandibelle16. (2016) All Rights Reserved

Three Line Tales: A Letter To Whomever Brought the Cupcakes #amwriting #3LineTales


Thanks to Sonya of 100 Words or Less for hosting 3 Line Tales.

——-

Stephanie McCabe

——-

To Whom It May Concern:

1. Wow, you’ve brought scrumptious, mouth watering, sinfully fattening, cupcakes to work, however; there’s a problem or three with the cupcakes you’ve bought to share; first of all, the cupcakes are small, if you’re going to allow us all to indulge in a cupcake, at least make the cupcake full size, not mini; cupcake are not a delicious treat most of us have often so please, don’t leave us wanting more ( a second cupcake) when you’ve only brought enough for one each.

2. The second issue I have is, your cupcakes aren’t chocolate; a most grevious error on your part, I don’t know who decides to bring cupcakes to work and doesn’t buy chocolate ones; chocolate is beloved by the majority of people and vanilla is boring (even if it vanilla does smell delightful), vanilla isn’t chocolate, it can’t compare; you’ve unknowingly offended at least all the females in our work area by bringing cupcakes which aren’t chocolate; in fact, I’d say my day is ruined, having seen the cupcakes and realized, they weren’t chocolate or even chocolate iced.

3. My third issue has to do with the icing on the cupcakes; I understand, you’re not the baker and you don’t ice the cupcakes yourself, but the icing is the best part of the cupcake; a slightly stale cupcake can get away with being stale, if the icing is to die for; vanilla icing could be satisfying but again, chocolate would have clearly, been the wiser icing choice; as well as choosing cupcakes which were “fully” iced; the baker’s icing style has much to be desired because the baker did not ice to the end of the cupcake, to the cupcake paper edge; icing is the most imperative aspect of a superb cupcake, perhaps, in the future, when you visit this cupcake bakery again, you will choose cupcakes with more icing; while the icing was delicious, there was far to little of it.

 I’m no cupcake expert, but I know what I like when I taste it.

Sincerely, 

Anonymous 

Poem: Laturnes – ” Yours”


http://www.thoughtcatalogue.com

——-

What,

We crave,

Is each of,

Us having love,

Trust.

—-

But, 

Deep is,

The wound which,

Past experience,

Made.

—-

Such, 

Pain from,

Simple texts,

Worse in person,

Hurts.

—-

Hate, 

You make,

Me hurt as,

If I’m raw I —

Bleed.

You’ve

No taste,

Decency,

Doesn’t exist,

Gorge.

—-

You

Eat my,

Goodness and,

I’m a hollow,

Girl.

—-

You,

Vulture,

Harming with,

Scent, warmth, promise,

Lies.

—-

Jerk,

Deteste,

You inside,

Out loud, vocal,

Cheat.

—-

Beast.

Burden,

On women,

Lowly dragon–

Fly.

Your 

Bites sting,

Taking it,

All, everything,

Thief.

I’ll

Never

Trust him,

When he comes by,

Ruined.

Rip,

Apart,

Women who,

Seem little girls,

Cry.

—-

The,

Inner,

Child she lives,

Laughing, alive,

Dies.

—-

Crush,

Her heart,

Break spirit,

Use body gifted,

Lust.

—–

Break

A Queen,

A proud girl,

Knew herself, not —

You

Cad,

Worst man,

She’s ever,

Met, broken child,

Tears.

—-

Where

Are you,

Beneath your,

Monster eating,

Souls.

—-

Hide,

Behind,

Your pretty,

Blue eyes, devise —

Pain.

—-

You,

Don’t mean,

A word you,

Say talking fibs, 

Words.

—-

Are,

You proud,

Made woman,

Cry, in pain, rage,

Run!

She

Bites ’cause,

She’s been here,

Before, deceived,

Worn.

—-

No, 

Leaving,

Quietly,

Stand and explain,

Truth.

You, 

Wanted, 

Her sweet body,

Fat, thin, perfect,

Thrall.

Tore,

At you,

She has needs,

Emotions stun,

Dumb.

—–

Did,

You peer, 

Inside her,

Beauty forming,

Shines.

Look,

Within,

Find your girl,

Queen to your King.

Safe.

—-

Trust,

Hope, Pray,

Work through it,

Make her not one–

Night.

——

This,

Woman, 

Worthy of, 

Not forgetting;

Yours.

——

 ©Mandibelle16. (2016) All Rights Reserved.

Poem: Etherees –  “Always Drunk at Thirty-Six”


http://www.hgn.com

——-

Hangovers must be hell at thirty-six.

It’s nice to feel a little tipsy,

But aren’t you too old for weekends,

Passed out; weekend nights binging,

No, don’t live life wasted,

Watch your intake guy,

Nice to let life, 

Be; Moving,

With the

Flow.

One,

Day you,

Need to put,

Your grown up pants,

On each foot and think,

“Do, I want to spend life —

Drinking time away when I —

Could be living life loving ’cause,

I’ve a woman who lights up my days?

When I’ve life complete, why spend it wasted ?”

There’s a reason we all get drunk, sometimes.

We’re hurt bad inside, we need numbness,

We’re trying to forget a hard job,

Covering monotony,

Or we need some courage,

To do difficult things,

Losing ourself,

In ruby-red,

Or white,

Beer.

—-

Try

We think,

How’d we get,

To this place where,

We’ve no memory,

Tried forgetting reality,

Was merely out for good times,

Spending the night laughing with friends,

Don’t remember conversations with some —

Woman, no girl who matters; booty call.

Hangover fades and you think back on her, there,

For your enjoyment, drunken fumble in, 

Some bedroom, yours — you always come,

To your place, you prefer to,

Make them leave embarrassed,

Because you’ve no memory,

They’re a night,

A moment,

You made,

Null.

—-

Void,

You hear,

Sounds so loud,

Awaking finally,

The worlds gone ink dark,

You’re wandering between,

Days, which keep fading into the —

Last day, recall being fully —

Awake, not caught in haze of rye, rum —

Shots done all night as in younger days.

—-

Maybe, you’ve never passed this stage, growing,

Past a point most people realize some–

Day in their late-twenties when,

Hangovers last two-days,

And along come their kids,

With their beloved spouse,

Socializing change,

Set example,

Fun times,

Change.

—-

But

I think,

You’re single,

Might impress on, 

Pretty women’s view,

You’re not in drunken haze,

You can hold your liquor well,

Enjoy yourself sometimes, let liquor —

Relax your soul, knowing your limit,

She sees you being yourself, not some drunk.

—–

©Mandibelle16. (2016) All Rights Reserved