Interview With Jackelyn Santana


Welcome back to another December issue of my biweekly interview series. Today I’m interviewing the gracious and beautiful Jackelyn Santana who was recently married. She has a faith based blog here: Faith Walking Hebrews 11:1. She describes her blog using the Hebrews 1:11 Bible Verse: “Now Faith Is The Assurance of Things Hoped For, The Conviction of things Not Seen.”


jackelyninterview
Jackelyn Santana

1. Jackelyn, Please Tell Us About Yourself?

My name is Jackelyn Santana, I am from Miami, FL, and my family is of Cuban descent.I am a child of God and passionate about my faith. I LOVE reading, blogging, and spending time with my family.  I was married on November 11, 2016 and  I am a mother to an amazing six-year-old and a stepmother to two beautiful young ladies.

This year has been full of blessings. To emotionally prepare myself for our marriage, I spent the year analyzing myself and I’m finally at a place where I can embrace my authenticity. I spent a good portion of my life internalizing my pain, wearing masks to cope, and believing something was wrong because I didn’t have everything as it seemed everyone around me had.

Having this frame of mind enslaved me. There wasn’t anything wrong with what I was facing, but because there’s a stigma associated with imperfection and emotional struggle, I thought it was a ‘ME’ problem. I didn’t realize the truth, my problems were natural and universal.

As I began opening up and peeling off the layers I was hiding under, I discovered more and more people who hid there pain as I was doing. We strengthened each other, helped each other heal, celebrated our spiritual growth, and learned to love ourselves no matter where we are in life.

The most beautiful thing I’ve witnessed is a group of hopeless lost souls coming together and loving each other back to life. We found a reason to smile again. This world is in such need of healing. I would love nothing more than to help spread love and healing wherever I go in my life.


” As I began opening up and peeling off the layers I was hiding under, I discovered more and more  people who hid there pain as I was doing. We strengthened each other, helped each other heal, celebrated our spiritual growth, and learned to love ourselves no matter where we are in life.” – Jackelyn Santana


2. When Did You Begin Blogging? What Does Blogging and Writing Mean To You?

I started blogging about four months ago July 20, 2016 to be exact. Blogging means everything to me! It’s liberated me. I’m free!! The more I write about things, the less ashamed I am of what I’ve faced. With each post I’ve removed the chains of emotions and experiences I kept a secret. These emotions and experiences have lost power over me.

This has allowed me to acknowledge and celebrate my spiritual growth. I enjoy interacting with other bloggers. Blogging also gives me an inside view of my soul. Sometimes I’m shocked when I read older posts because when I wrote, I let the words flow from my soul and they expressed things I wouldn’t voice out loud.


3. Where Do You Find Your Inspiration and Motivation To Write?

I am inspired by my faith and other bloggers. I began blogging about one-year ago, but I didn’t think I could write posts people would want to read. I’m better at public speaking than I am at writing. A co-worker of mine kept pushing me to write. I would share advice with her and she would nudge me to put it on paper. I finally decided to test the waters by submitting a guest post on Proverbs 31 Women.

They approved my guest post one-month later and I was shocked and honored.  I started writing away on my blog often. My faith in God changed my life, it wasn’t until I understood my faith better that I was able to apply its principles to my life. In the past few years I’ve uncovered so much richness I was missing out on because I didn’t study my beliefs. It’s become a way of life for me and I want to help others learn about Jesus in practical terms.

Many times when we think of the Bible we think of a standard which is too high for most of us to reach. The Bible comes across as something only ‘Holy’ people read. Or, we become intimidated by it because we find it unrelatable since The Bible was written many moons ago and times have changed.

These ideas of Christianity couldn’t be further from the truth. We need to find the right tools to break down barriers from reading God’s Word, The Bible, and help others understand faith in simpler terms. Believing in Jesus can guide us towards love and happiness. Once we understand the basics, our soul will keep searching for more – our hearts will be “homing our Heavenly home,” if you will, and we will grow spiritually.

By identifying with examples from the stories in The Bible, we can understand our obstacles are not too much, our lives can be molded in a way which allows us to serve both God, our families, and friends because they’re all related.

God acknowledges our need for connection and sent his son Jesus not only so that we could be saved, but so we could identify with Jesus and strive to imitate His way of life. As a woman, fiancee, and mother, I have been able to love more purely and unconditionally through The Bible’s teachings, making them a way of life.

Reflecting on the dark moments I’ve faced, I see how fine the line between good and evil can be — being saved or being lost; I want to help others be saved as I am saved through Jesus’s death and resurrection. 


“My faith in God changed my life, it wasn’t until I understood my faith better that I was able to apply its principles to my life. In the past few years I’ve uncovered so much richness I was missing out on because I didn’t study my beliefs.’ – Jackelyn Santana


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Jackelyn Santana

4. When Do You Like to Write and Do You Have Any Current Special Writing Projects?

There isn’t a time of day that inspires me the most. I write whenever my heart moves me to write. As of today I’m only blogging. My passion and dream is to help others. Perhaps join /create a traveling retreat group, or participate in spiritual workshops. This is a concept similar to a ‘Women of Faith’ tour, but on a smaller more personal level.

There would be one to one interaction, healing exercises, and honest group talk. I would love to help others come out of their shells and be saved through faith in Jesus and God as I was. My healing is made possible through God and meeting an amazing group of women in my Emmaus Ministry who were transparent about their struggles and shared tips on overcoming the obstacles of life.


5. Are You Planning on Publishing Any Written Work in The Future?

I have not published anything. Perhaps later in life I will be presented the opportunity to do so, or I will submit writing drafts. With only four-months of blogging under my belt I’m focusing on identifying my writing voice, interacting with others through my writing, and improving my writing skills which are at a novice level. I would also like to study theology and I think it would further advance my writing.


“My healing is made possible through God and meeting an amazing group of women in my Emmaus Ministry who were transparent about their struggles and shared tips on overcoming the obstacles of life.”


6. What Is Your Writing Process Like?

I sit in front of my laptop or a notepad and I pray, relax, and set my soul free to express itself. When an idea pops into my mind I write it down either on my phone’s notepad, or sticky notes. I may begin draft posts that I revisit at a later time when I can give my writing undivided attention. I have about fourteen draft posts which I’ve begun and I’m saving for the future blog posts.

When I first started blogging I would write and post instantly. I’ve learned to slow down and process topics, allowing my mind to continue digging for information. I will officially post my writing after I have looked at every angle.


7. Do You Have Any Helpful Advice for Other Writers Starting Out?

Write about topics you are passionate about. It feels great to do what you love. I love what I write about and it’s how I live my life. If you’re on the fence about writing I would suggest you take a leap of faith and see what comes from this desire.

WordPress has a wonderful community of bloggers and this community helps you grow as a writer. Don’t write posts for the sake of increasing traffic and followers, write on topics you enjoy writing about.  


8. Is There Anything Else You Would Like To Share Pertinent to Yourself or Your Writing?

I am God’s creation, I am human, I am imperfect, and I am meant to depend on God. Read this post to learn more about me.


9. Please Share With Us Some Of Your Favorite Blog Posts:

Slogging Through The Tears

By Jackelyn Santana

*****

“Sensitive people are the most genuine and honest people you will ever meet. There is nothing they won’t tell you about themselves if they trust your kindness. However, the moment you betray them, reject them or devalue them, they become the worse type of person. Unfortunately, they end up hurting themselves in the long run. They don’t want to hurt other people. It is against their very nature.  They want to make amends and undo the wrong they did. Their life is a wave of  highs and lows. They live with guilt and constant pain over unresolved situations and misunderstandings.  They are tortured souls that are not able to live with hatred or being hated. This type of person needs  the most love anyone can give them because their soul has been constantly bruised by others. However, despite the tragedy of what they have to go through in life, they remain the most compassionate people worth knowing, and the ones that often become activists for the broken hearted, forgotten and the misunderstood. They are angels with broken wings that only fly when loved.” –Shannon L. Alder

 *****

I am on an emotional roller coaster ride.

rollercoaster

I will not try to deny it, this is who I am, sensitivity and all. I wear my sensitivity as a badge of honor, although throughout life I have been ridiculed or further wounded because of it. I cannot control the sensitive nature of my heart. I may pretend something has not stabbed or wounded me, but more likely than not this is not the case.

For many years I have tried to harden myself, hoping that I would become immune to the blows of life, and the harsh words received from those I hold with high esteem. Despite my efforts, my sensitive nature is unchanged.

My sensitive nature is misunderstood.

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Those closest to me believe they understand me and my motives. They believe they can read between the lines. Many dare to correct me when I express my intentions and motives, determined their interpretation of my position is correct. My hard and serious exterior denies me the right to ever be recognized as a victim, although, my heart tells me otherwise. Many times I find myself confused, doubting my heart, thinking that there is something severely wrong because I’m always wrong and never right about my own feelings. Maybe I am bad at the core?

One Of My Favorite Bible Verses:

“For what I am doing, I do not understand; for I am not practicing what I would like to do, but I am doing the very thing I hate.”  Romans 7:15

broken-heartIn my case, I do not understand why I continue to love and care the way I do. I know better, yet I cannot help it. I continue to express my vulnerabilities to those I care about in hopes that I will be understood. The more I explain myself, the further away I get from MY truth, and the closer I get to shedding unfavorable light on myself. I allow the fighter in me to get the best of me when I feel taken advantage of. This without a doubt, is used against me as I fail to be consistent, giving in to my human frailty. I can only be silent for so long without jumping into protective mode. I can only shed so many tears without lashing out. The cruelty I spew is the cruelty I have learned through life, it is not the natural nature of my heart. I would never purposely provoke tears from anyone, not even those who have hurt me profoundly. Yet sometimes acting in this manner is the only way I can get someone to listen to my voice and believe my truth. I am neither too proud to extend an apology when deserved and make amends with those I’ve offended. My truest desire is to maintain peace.

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I am not taken seriously in my tender moments; my tenderness is taken for granted. The world demands yet resents my tenderness. Should a loved one offend me, my tenderness is an inconvenience because my tears take away from focusing on the “root” of the problem, and I am forced to slog against the tears. Should I act sternly with others, not allowing my emotions to flinch, I’m accused of being cold and harsh. The combination of my emotions is never seen as right.

It seems my sensitivity is to be used at the convenience of others. I can never be me. I’m never entitled to the beauty of my emotions. My view of my emotions is brushed off because I am overly sensitive. Yet, I cannot label the world as overly cruel, overly angry, or overly unforgiving.

I read once that instead of numbing our pain we need to identify the source of our pain and work on the problem instead of the symptom. For example, we may have a headache because we are dehydrated, hungry, or stressed. We should work on fixing those issues rather than silencing the headache calling out for attention.

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The same goes for my tears. My tears, the ‘water works’ as they’ve been called, are not crocodile tears. It’s not an act or an attempt to manipulate; these statements couldn’t be further from the truth. My tears are indicators that my soul is experiencing pain, something is hurting me. To stop my pain at it’s root I need to either freeze my heart (which I have failed to accomplish) or excuse myself from the undesirable situation until I’m emotionally ready. This I can rarely accomplish without ridicule that I cannot work through a topic, without being accused of being overly dramatic.

I am always apologizing, but rarely entitled to an apology when hurt because my over-sensitivity is what causes the pain, not the actions or words of others.

When is my sensitive nature ever right for me!?

People say my tears and sensitive nature take away from the moment. I have slogged away for a good portion of my life to hide these parts of myself. I keep my tears a secret and am ashamed of my weakness.

As an adult, I find that my sensitive nature and heart are not the problem. The problem is the lack of sensitivity in the world. It’s not the compassionate who are the problem; a lack of empathy is the problem!  I will continue to embrace my sensitivity, tears and all. I do not lose hope there are more sensitive people out there. I won’t (and truthfully can’t) harden myself and lose hope because I find the world to be cruel and unloving. I am who I am. I am transparent.My anger is pain masked with anger. It’s sadness for being the recipient of a pain I would never wish to inflict on others. It’s a betrayal I never foresaw. It’s the second opportunity no one else would’ve extended, yet I’ve already extended a third to my offender while knowing how the situation will likely end. It’s fighting the urge to assume the worst in others. It’s the unconditional love I am willing to give which is rarely cashed in.

It’s the product of a broken heart living in a broken world that is trying to break the best in me.

  “Highly sensitive people are too often perceived as weaklings or damaged goods. To feel intensely is not a symptom of weakness, it is the trademark of the truly alive and compassionate. It is not the empath who is broken, it is society that has become dysfunctional and emotionally disabled. There is no shame in expressing your authentic feelings. Those who are at times described as being a “hot mess” or having “too many issues” are the very fabric of what keeps the dream alive for a more caring, humane world. Never be ashamed to let your tears shine a light in this world.” – Anthon St. Maarten

Slog

*****


Here Are More of Jackelyn’s Posts:


Thank you so much Jackelyn for agreeing to be interviewed. I am thrilled to find out so much about you and hope your struggles in life have become easier to handle through your faith. I hope you have more peaceful moments, than times which stress you out. Here is one more link to Jackelyn’s BlogFaith Walking Hebrews 11:1


Thanks for reading! If you would like to answer some interview questions about writing/blogging/poetry and your unique perspective and process on writing, I would encourage you to reach-out to me on my Contact Page. I would love to have you featured as a biweekly interviewee. See you in two-weeks!


©Mandibelle16. (2016) All Rights Reserved.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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Interview With Katrina Sarah Cain


Welcome back to my bi-weekly interview series. Today I am interviewing the talented poet, wonderful person, and beautiful lady, Katrina Sarah Cain. Please check-out her blog The Darkest Fairytale herewww.thedarkestfairytale.wordpress.com

Katrina Interview Picture
Katrina Cain

1. Please Tell Us About Yourself Katrina?
Well what can I say about myself? My name is Katrina and I live in England. I’m twenty-four-years old. I work in data analysis and I’m secretly, a massive geek. I have a interest in psychology, philosophy, and any science really. I’m also an identical twin. My hobbies include Pokemon-Go, gaming, keeping fit, and I’m a general adventure seeker. If I had to describe myself I would say I’m fun, sarcastic, a realist, and wise with old fashioned morals.

2. When Did You Begin Writing and Blogging? What Does It Mean to You? Why Do You Write?
I began blogging in January 2016. I started my blog without any intention of anything special coming out, but then I began writing poetry and it turned my blogging into writing-therapy for myself. I do apologize to my readers for some of my random pieces.
My sister initially, told me blogging and writing was great therapy for a person. I thought, ‘Why not? We all need some therapy?’ I had never written much before, hence, my terrible grammar, but once I started writing I realized I had a talent for it and I began to enjoy it.
Poetry to me isn’t just words, it’s an expression of what we’re unable to say out loud and it helps us relate to others.When I started writing it wasn’t only about rhyming or poetry, it was about reaching out to others, people with similar experiences to me and still go through these experiences. If one person can find inspiration or peace in what I write, then it means everything to me.

“I started writing because my sister told me it was great therapy for a person. I thought, ‘Why not? We all need some therapy?’ . . .When I began writing it wasn’t only about rhyming or poetry, it was reaching out to others . . .If one person can find inspiration or peace in what I write, then it means everything to me.” – Katrina Sarah Cain

3. Where Do You Find Your Inspiration and Motivation to Write?

I cannot say anyone in particular, inspires me. I aim to write most days, but I often get  frequent writer’s block. I think most of you can relate. I’ll be sitting at home thinking  of what to write and nothing appears. Then, I’ll be preparing tea and my mind turns into a rhyming magician and I rush to write down what I’m thinking. My poetry is either written at the most random of moments or when I am feeling low or written when I have something specific on my mind to write about.

4. Do You Find There Is A Time Of Day You Most Like to Write? What Are Your Most Current Poetry Projects? Are You Planning On Publishing Any Of Your Work?

The time of day I end up writing is probably, in the evening or at night when my mind decides it’s nocturnal and comes alive. I don’t have any current projects, only what I put my blog; poetry published when the the words appear for me to write. No, I’m not planning on publishing my work. At the moment, I blog and that’s all.

” . . .[M]y mind turns into a rhyming magician and I write down what I’m thinking. My poetry is either written the most random of moments or when I am feeling low or written when I have something specific on my mind to write about.” – Katrina Sarah Cain

5. Do You Have A Writing Process? Do You Prefer Certain Areas of Writing or Reading Genres?

 My writing process is unorganized and unpredictable. I say no, I don’t have any preferred writing or reading genres but then I look back on my blog and I see some pieces are rather dark. I think when I write poetry, I stick to my perspective of life and the reality of life which many people tend to miss; the things we long for but don’t actually express verbally or otherwise.

6. Do You Have Any Helpful Advice For Other Writers or Bloggers?
Yes, it’s your blog and it’s your words. Not everyone will understand how you mind works, but as longs as you enjoy writing keep at it. No one should judge you for your self-expression, but yourself. There’s always magic in artistic expression, chose to express yourself how you want to in your writing (on your blog) and in life.

” . . .I stick to my perspective of life and the reality of life which many people tend to miss of what happens in everyday life; the things we long for but don’t actually express verbally or otherwise.” – Katrina Sarah Cain

7. Can You Please Share With Us A Few Links From You Blog, Some Of Your Favorite Or Most Loved Pieces?

Would you
Kiss
My lips,
If they’re
Bleeding
Pain?
Would you
Wipe away
Acid,
If my tears
Leaked with
Shame?
Would you
Hold me
Close,
If my heart
Fired
Ice?
Would you
Carry me
Home,
If I’d fled
From this
Life?
Would you
Chase me
Into a
Storm,
To battle my
Thunder?
Would you
Protect me
With your
Arms,
To give me
Shelter
To hide
Under?
Would you
love me
If this
Was reality
Could anyone
Ever
Love me,
Unconditionally.

(July 24, 2016 – Katrina Sarah Cain)


Here Are Some Links To More Pieces of Poetry By Katrina:

Thank You to Katrina for sharing her journey beginning to write poetry, using blogging as therapy to help herself and help others relate to similar life issues, and providing inspiration through her fantastic writing. The link to her blog is here againThe Darkest Fairytale. Please make sure to visit her blog and follow, I guarantee you will not be sorry, her poetry is amazing!

Would you like to be interviewed for my bi-weekly writer/blogger interview? I would love to read and learn about you, your writing, and your writing process and so would my followers. If you would like to be interviewed please reach-out to me through my Contact Page and I will email you some interview questions. Thank you for reading and have a lovely September!

©Mandibelle16. (2016) All Rights Reserved.

NaPoWriMo: Poem – Cinquin – “Unconditional Love”


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And now for today’s (optional) prompt! Today, I challenge you to write a poem in which you closely describe an object or place, and then end with a much more abstract line that doesn’t seemingly have anything to do with that object or place, but which, of course, really does. I think of the “surprise” ending to this James Wright Poem as a model for the effect I’m hoping you’ll achieve. An abstract, philosophical kind of statement closing out a poem that is otherwise intensely focused on physical, sensory details. Happy writing!

For more information please visit NaPoWriMo

——-

  
——–

Let me,

Tell you of her,

Fur so soft, silky, faun,

Course hair ontop, white underneath.

Ears back.

—–

Relaxed,

In this posture,

One paw on you always,

Rump on your lap, managed.

Love shown.

—-

On side, 

Lifting leg, paw,

Access given, sweet spot,

Rounded tummy, furry, blissful.

Eyes shut.

—–

Rub her,

Tummy, circle.

She’ll stay for hours while you,

Worship her tummy soft, peering up,

Brown eyes.

—–

Liner,

Of Northern Dogs,

Around her mischievous eyes,

For blocking out sunlight, arctic light.

Hackles.

—–

Raised,

When she thinks you’re,

Threatening her pack, protection —

Her job, in her domain, deep bark,

Incharge.

—–

Waiting

For her treat when, 

You’re finished with your lunch food,

She receives last bite and it seems more,

Pleased

—–

No charge, 

Unconditional,

Love a dog shows family,

Cuddling, thanking, and begging,

Large heart.

—–

Loving,

The way humans,

In her world should love,

Love each other, unconditionally,

So, hard! 

—–

©Mandibelle16. (2016) All Rights Reserved.