Sunday Photo Fiction: Still His #amwriting #flashfiction


Thanks to Alistair Forbes for hosting SPF.

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A Mixed Bag

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Caden wasn’t sure how he arrived at the park; his feet had walked themselves there. He sat on a park bench feeling empty and worthless. In front of him sat an old Chinese stove, but he gave it little thought. 

He’d lost Caroline for real this times and Caden didn’t know how to get her back. Lyrics from the song playing in the pub as she walked away from him, were on a continuel loop in his mind; she loved that song. He sighed, begging his mind to forget the painful lyrics.

“She’s imperfect but she tries, she is good but she lies. She is hard on herself, she is broken and won’t ask for help. She is messy but she’s kind, she’s is lonely –most of the time. She is all of this mixed up and baked in a beautiful pie; she is gone but she used to be mine.” 

Caden hadn’t ever felt so low. What did a man do when the woman he thought he’d stay with forever disappeared and wouldn’t talk to him? 

No one seemed to know where Caroline was. He had almost cried in front of her Dad saying he only wanted to apologize and win her back. Caroline’s Dad patted Caden on the back saying,”Things will get better soon.” 

Caden stared at the odd Chinese Stove wondering what its purpose was. He attempted to distract himself with the stove as the lyrics from that damn song floated back to him:

“If I’m honest I know I would give it all back for a chance to start over and rewrite an ending or two. For the girl that I knew who’ll be reckless just enough, who’ll get hurt but, who learns how to toughen up when she’s bruised . . . she is gone but she used to be mine.” 

Caden pressed his hands against his ears, trying to block the words out. 

Suddenly, Caroline was standing in front of him, “How did you get here?” He asked her.

She gazed at him, “You look horrible Caden. Did I do that to you?” 

He gasped shocked at seeing her, truly there now sitting beside him. Caden couldn’t hold back, he cried into Caroline’s neck as she stroked his hair; he held onto her tightly. 

“I thought you would never forgive me,” he said. 

“It’s alright,” she crooned to him, “I’m not leaving you ever again.” 

Caroline was still Caden’s girl. 

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Sara Barielles – “She Used to Be Mine” 

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Lyrics from AZlyrics Sara Barielles Lyrics.

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©Mandibelle16. (2016) All Rights Reserved. 

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My List of Songs That Have Created Memories


1. Crazy In Love – Beyoncé

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I’m not sure how to explain the meaning behind this song for me. It came out when I was around eighteen or nineteen-years-old. I relate it to a sense of freedom and fun times had with friends, especially with friends who have remained friends ten or more years later. Not to mention, this song kind of keeps staying popular as time progresses. That I know of, there are about three different versions of “Crazy In Love,” and I’m sure there is probably more. It is a song that always gets me dancing. 

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2. Red High Heels – Kelly Pickler

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Maybe this more of the partier in me, but it is also a piece of the girl who became the woman. It is about self-confidence and finding yourself in a world that tells woman they have to do so many things to be beautiful. To me this was the anthem of the girl some guys treated miserably. They didn’t care for her feelings, they just saw an opportunity to try to take her home. This is a power anthem, “your about to see just how missing me feels, in my red high heels.” Proof that great shoes are vital to a woman and a woman is most powerful when she sticks to her guns, and doesn’t compromise her values.

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3. Before He Cheats – Carrie Underwood.

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Haha more lady power! Sorry guys I would never actually do this to any man’s truck, but there are a few guys I dealt with that I wanted to do this to their vehicle. Some guys when they are young especially, don’t know how easily and carelessly they hurt women. So this song just made me feel good about myself again and I loved dancing to it in country bars with my friends. It is Carrie Underwoods second huge hit and she sings it awesome live in concert. I’ve seen her a few times luckily. 

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4. Chasing Cars – Snow Patrol

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I think this song came about around the sametime the show Grey’s Anatomy was in its first few seasons. Almost everybody I knew, loved this song when it came out. I found meaning through it on Grey’s, it was often played when Derek and Meredith were experiencing a special moment as their relationship developed. Later, it was played last year, when Meredith let Derek go and took away life support, as he was brain dead after his SUV was hit by a semi. It also played when Meredith went into the house Derek built for their family, –alone for the first time after Derek’s death. So, I suppose I really just love Grey’s and the relationship Derek and Meredith had, held a truthfulness and closeness I wanted someday in reality. The song also reminds me of sadness when I think of what could have been but isn’t. It’s about being about that wonderful time in love, when you want to “just forget the world.”

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5. Be Still – The Fray

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The full meaning of this song is difficult for me to grasp. On the surface, I think it is some guy telling his girlfriend, that he will be her resting place, and always be there for her. But in my mind, in my heart, I’m sure the lead singer is talking about God. “Be still and Know that I am the Lord Your God.” I have turned to this song in many situations when I have felt helpless, worn out, and hopeless. Each time I hear it, I hear God telling me it is going to be okay that I need to do nothing but “be still.” He will do what needs to be done, he is ultimately in control.

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6. Fighter – Christina Anguilera 

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This is a song I first played when things never went anywhere with the first guy I loved/liked. To this day I don’t know if I loved him or not. I think I did, but I’m not sure why, I didn’t know him that well to love him did I? But it still feels as if the emotion was there. Getting over him, or maybe my idea of him, took a long time. From the time I downloaded this song on my IPod, it gave me hope and showed me how strong I can be. My experiences, made me “a fighter.” And today when I hear this song, I know I will always fight for what’s important to me, not men who act how he did.

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7. Temporary Home – Carrie Underwood

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I think this is a beautiful song. Carrie Underwood is one of my favourite artists. One reason is because she can sing kick ass girl power anthems but can also sing songs that are softer, of a spiritual quality. This song makes me cry when I hear it. I’m not sure why, but it makes me think of Carrie’s lyrics and how life on earth is only a temporary thing. One day we’ll die and if we have Jesus, we will go to heaven — life with him is more important then life on earth.”This is my temporary home, windows and rooms that I’m passing through. This is just a stop on the way to where I’m going. I’m not afraid because I know, this is my temporary home.”

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8.  The House that Built Me – Miranda Lambert

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I don’t think that anyone has gotten to where they are without the help of their families, whether that family is related or not. This song makes me cry too, because it reminds me that my family built me, made me the person I’ve become. It makes me think back to those years when I was a child or a teenager, almost wishing I could experience those times again. But I’m an adult now and here where I am, my family is still building me.

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9. Fix Me Up – Tegan and Sara

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This song is also, one of those wonderful songs played in the beginning of Grey’s Anatomy. It has a lot of correlation between Derek and Meredith and their relationship on the show. I heard the song and went out and bought the CD immediately. It is a lovely song. It always made me think that we can try to fix and change someone all we want but in the end we only need their love. “This love is all I have to give,” Tegan and Sara sing. Like Meredith, we have to put ourselves out their and give the best love we can give in life.

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10. Brave – Sara Bareilles

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This is a new song for me, I’m not sure why I didn’t hear it before now, considering I’m a huge fan of Sara’s. It has influenced me a lot lately. I’m trying to push myself as a writer and as a person, out of my comfort zone. I’m trying to make my writing better and trying to get some of it published. In addition, I’m working hard at being healthier and eating well. But it’s hard being brave. Even though you maybe trying to be brave, not everyone is. And you can’t push someone who is not willing to push themselves out of their comfort zone –frustrating but true.

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Thanks to  La Duchesse D’erat for this weeks list prompt.