Happy New Year 2017!!!!! Here are some quotes to start the new year off right. I look forward this year to exciting challenges to learn from, experiences to be present in, and new people I will have to pleasure to know and meet both out and about and in the blogging/writing world online.
Thank you to all of you who follow my blog and/or read my blog posts and writing. Thank you for your support and for your time! It’s much appreciated as are your likes, comments, and follows on WordPress, Twitter, Tumblr, Instagram, and Facebook!!!! You are amazing!!!! Hoping 2017 is everything fantastic you hope it will be!
“Why don’t they rebuild this old stone building Grandpa?”
“You know well, Gertrude, it costs a great deal to repair a historical building. They can’t even take it down because this building is a designated historical site.”
“That doesn’t seem right. Why would we leave something so valuable to history, to fall apart? Eventually it will only be a pile of rubble and everyone will forget its significigance,” Gertrude mused.
” Maybe someday someone like you, Gertrude, will restore the building. It’s a painstaking process and you must use and find authentic materials.”
She nodded. “I understand Grandpa, but sometimes certain cities choose not to rebuild. Like in Venice, many buildings are left to disintegrate and collapse into the water. They don’t let architects even plan to rebuild. Many once grand buildings are in such dangerous condition, they’ve been left so long.”
“Restoring old buildings can be good Gertrude. They are a part of humanity’s history. We need to remember our history to learn from it. But sometimes we need to knock old buildings down and design better ones from our present day knowledge. Future generations can learn from us through newer buildings too,” Grandpa said.
Gertrude nodded. She was training to be an architect but was only a freshman in university. Her Grandpa had been a great architect and was still well known.
“What will future people learn from our buildings, Grandpa?”
“Hopefully, they’ll learn our buildings are stronger. Made with more thought to design, to the environment, and how the everyday person lives. Our simple routines we take for granted are our history as much as the calamities of our time.”
Gertrude frowned, turning to her Grandpa. He was wearing his WWII uniform for the Rememberance Day Ceremony; he was going to walk in a parade as well.
“Will they remember men such as you, Grandpa? Men who fought for their freedom in Normandy and in other places in Europe? Will they understand why you and other soldiers have nightmares from war? Will they remember why you had to fight and saw so many of your buddies die brutally?”
A tear escaped Grandpa’s eye and he shook his head, not able to speak. He was too afraid what he and his fellow soldiers had fought for in brutal war, would melt away in time.
Lest We Not Forget. November 11th is Remberance Day in Canada.
“In Flanders Fields”
John McCrae, 1872 – 1918
In Flanders fields the poppies blow
Between the crosses, row on row,
And last but not least, our prompt (optional, as always). Today I challenge you to write a “mix-and-match” poem in which you mingle fancy vocabulary with distinctly un-fancy words. First, spend five minutes writing a list of overly poetic words – words that you think just sound too high-flown to really be used by anyone in everyday speech. Examples might be vesper, heliotrope, or excelsior. Now spend five minutes writing words that you might use or hear every day, but which seem too boring or quotidian to be in a poem. Examples might be garbage disposal, doggy bag, bathroom. Now mix and match examples from both of your lists into a single poem. Hopefully you’ll end up with a poem that makes the everyday seem poetic, and which keeps your poetic language grounded. Happy writing!
It was along time before I had my first ‘real’ relationship. I went on Plenty Of a Fish, because my friend had met her husband on that site. My ex-boyfriend, was not like the other men I talked to. He didn’t ask me what my job was or about sex. He asked me about my religion. He was Muslim and wanted to date a nice girl with morals, ethics, and who was close to her family. I was reluctant to date him because my ex’s religion is Islam and I grew up with Christianity. But I had never dated anyone longterm before. My ex-boyfriend was attractive and fun so I began dating him.
My ex worked up North, where all the people who worked in the oil field, lived in camps. My ex worked three weeks on and one week off. I saw him once a week when he was home My ex was accepting of my condition. He didn’t mind that I lived with a mental illness which caused me fatigue and limited how long I could be out with him. He was quiet to begin with but later he opened up to me.
Our relationship functioned for awhile. My health improved so we were going out three times a week when he was here. Often, my ex would take an extra week off. My ex was gentle and he listened well. He gave good advice. But there were some issues in our relationship that became apparent.
The biggest issue was my ex staying in contact while working up North. Eventually, we were texting once or twice a day and I would call him every couple of weeks. It took three years to get to this point and a lot of hardwork on my end. When my ex was home we were together a lot. But I had to be diligent about making ‘talking’ and ‘getting to know each other better’ happen.
My ex would also come back from work and go on a trip without telling me where he was going. Suddenly, there was no way for me to talk to him, sometimes for two-weeks. I learned he was seeing friends or had gone off on a road trip for awhile with his cousin. At first, I worried a great deal when all communication was cut-off. I often thought early on, he had decided not see me anymore. He accused me of seeing other guys in the beginning.
Ramadan was an extremely difficult time for our relationship. For the first couple of years we were together, my ex went to Saskatchewan to do his fasting with friends. Almost the entirety of June and July would pass and I barely was able talk or contact my ex because the cell reception wasn’t good. He was scarcely able to use Internet and he never tried to phone me. Although, I attempted to phone him.
It was along time before my ex talked to me during Ramadan and an even longer time before he would go out with me in the daytime. Males can’t touch a woman they’re not married to during Ramadan before sunset. Muslims also spend a great deal of time reading the Quran in the day. I had no problem with my ex practising his faith during Ramadan, it was the fact he barely paid attention to me. Later, when my health became worse it was a challenge to see him at night anytime before 11:00 pm. It also took my ex an eternity to meet my family. He was scared of my Dad. He met my Mom a couple of times but not my Dad until the fourth year we were dating.
The issue that finished us was me. I didn’t find the relationship to be fulfilling, I never felt secure. When I didn’t hear from him for awhile or he wouldn’t listen to me, I would break up with him because I couldn’t handle it. I broke up four more times with my ex because I felt he was ignoring me and he wasn’t giving time to our relationship. I didn’t hear anything from him for a month one time. He wanted to get married but he valued all the activities he wanted to do above his time with me. My family is also special to me and so was my ex becoming apart of my family, which he never attempted.
I went the last nine months without breaking up with him. He wanted to get married. I went to a friend’s wedding at her church. She was walked down the aisle by her Dad and her husband and she made their vows before God.
At this point, I knew something was wrong with my ex’s and my relationship big time. I wanted to be like my friend and walk down the church aisle when I married. I believed in a Jesus who wasn’t merely a prophet but God’s Son. If I ever had kids, I wanted them brought up with The Bible and Jesus’ promise of salvation.
My ex hadn’t even told his Muslim family back home about me, even though Muslims are allowed to marry Christian girls. I knew his cousin because he lived with him and had been introduced to the odd friend of my ex’s at the bar. But after four years, I had no idea who most of his good friends were. Some of our problems were due to my health. I became worse for awhile and it became too much to date him often because he usually wanted to get together at night.
Mostly, I needed a fresh start. I needed to develop myself as a person on my own. I needed freedom. It was hard letting go of my ex but the religion issue finally pushed me over the edge. My family is extremely Christian and I couldn’t deal with relatives who didn’t think our relationship was right, when I wasn’t into my ex anymore. I wanted a guy who involved himself in my family, friends, and life — who could relate to my lifestyle.
I’m busy in my single life. My ex was a good boyfriend but he was not the guy for me. In a relationship, when it is the right relationship, you want to be with the other person exceedingly. You want to be with the other person so much because you love them and can work together to build a life sharing similar values. I wanted freedom and a chance to see what the world outside of “us” offered; for this reason my ex is my ex.
This song represents to me a women who will never give up and never break no matter how much you push her. She is a strong women, “a fighter,” and she’s not going to let the man who was in her life or anyone else win that fight. In fact, she thanks the guy who hurt because he made her what she is and he has made her “stronger,” ” makes her work a little bit harder,” made her “that much wiser,” made her work ” a little bit faster,” made her “skin a little bit thicker” made her ” that much smarter.” She thanks him for making her “a fighter.”
I started playing this song when I meant K in university. He was the first guy I’d ever been crazily attracted to and I knew he liked me back. The thing was I was awful shy and I didn’t handle the situation well and when I couldn’t deal with so much attention I tended to ignore the person giving it to me. Then I realized he wasn’t paying me much attention anyways. He had a harem of girls at his table and even though I sat by myself in the Cafeteria and he would wave to me he never came to talk to me and he never shared anything much about himself with me when he did. He acted bored when I sat by him and finally when I told him I liked him and that sometimes I ignored him because ” I was in my own world” or to say it better, I was busy as hell, to busy to put up with his crap — taking 5 courses in University, working 20 hours a week, going to the gym, and partying with my girl friends on the weekend — he took this the wrong way. But I had finally figured out that he liked the fact that I liked him but didn’t want to make a real effort for me, I was just another girl who was a friend, but not that important.
I started listening to this song and I realized that even though he was a jerk he had made me a stronger person. I spent all this time worrying about him when I was better than the way he was treating me, many other guys who were friends treated me better. I was a fighter and I wasn’t going to cry and get all upset because he wouldn’t give me the time a day. He was my first love ( or so I thought at the time) but later I learned he was just the beginning of a stronger me. A me that could push herself and get through very hard times like sickness, and a difficult job, a me that could survive rejection, a me that was wearer and carried her strength about her like a cloak. It isn’t always obvious but God made me a strong women he made me a fighter, a women who knows what’s worth fighting for.
2. Billy Joel – She’s Always A Woman
She’s Always a Woman is one of my favorite songs and I could hear it hundreds of times and never get sick of it. I love it because it describes a man who loves a women who is most definitely flawed; that she’s flawed is of great value to her person. For example ” she never gives out, and she never gives in, she just changes her mind” but she’s still “always a woman” to him. I have always thought that this is the way that people should love each other: because of their flaws and all their imperfections. When I met the right man one day, I wanted him to love me like this because I was “frequently kind and suddenly cruel,” because ” I did as [I pleased I] was nobodies fool.” I wanted him to love me just as I am and not because he had some image of how he wanted me to be or thought I should be. It’s the kind of the love that doesn’t count mistakes and I kind of love immortalized by John Donne in a poem whose name escapes me where he loves a women even though she is clearly not the most beautiful or perfect creature.
I have put this kind of love to practice in my life when I love my family or love my friends, when I meet new people. I don’t try to push such high standards on people, something I used to do, instead I try to accept people for who they are and try not to get so upset when they do something that hurts me. I’ve learned to realize they are only human to and worthy of love anyways. I think if people put this to practice more they would find like Billy Joel there is beauty in being flawed and that our flaws make us who we are. Nobody could love someone who is perfect because nobody is perfect and can’t be held to that standard.
3. The Fray – Be Still
I think this is the most important song to me because when I think of the song I think of the Bible verse “Be Still, and know that I am the Lord Your God.” I think of the song as God or someone who loved you without failing, watching over you, and telling you to just “Be Still” and relax. “Be Still” and everything will be fine. It’s like a lullaby. “If no one is standing beside you, be still and know I am” that line always reassure me that we always have God and people in our life to depend on. That when things get really bad, and they do, we always have a higher power and family and friends to guard against the situations in life where we are hurting and falling apart.
This song puts me to sleep some nights when I feel at my lowest. It makes me feel like I am not alone in my suffering nor in my life. That there is a tomorrow to look forward to and that times won’t always be this bad. That we should “remember hard” the words to “Be Still” and not spend time worrying about the bad times in our life that we cannot change. That even when we lose sight of ourselves, there is always someone who remembers us and cares.
I think a lot of times in this world, people feel left out and left behind. It is easy to forget and not give fair thought to the everyday people who do what they do quietly and with little complaint. So many people are so outgoing while just as many other people are introverted and think their way through life quietly while others have to think out loud.
Jobs are a really good example of this theory as many people who do not have the ‘right’ connections or know the right people find it difficult to get ahead in employment. How do you further career with nepotism or the fact that charismatic people seem to advance further than quieter less assertive types.
There is also the fact that people get used to a person being a certain way and just assume that’s what their like. For instance, you do not know what good ideas are going through an introverted person’s head because they may choose their words carefully. And not everyone is made to be charismatic and outgoing. Some people are just your average person. Or you may never see how the average person is actually very talented at the piano, or good with their kids.
A lot of who we pay attention to is based on attributes that aren’t necessarily good determiners of what makes a good or talented person. It’s important to recognize that a great team is made up of introverted, extroverted, and every type of person in between. Friendships can be invaluable with people for example who are not all trying to get attention, or with people who do not all feel shy sharing their thoughts. Good conversation requires many different ideas and thoughts as well.
Improvement can also be made by both extroverted and introverted types of people. People who have trouble talking out loud need to make an effort to vocally share their ideas because they have good ones to share and extroverted people need to ensure they let introverts talk and take time to listen to their interesting points of view. There are also diversified jobs and abilities that different people can have because of their personalities. Louder personalities maybe better at giving big speeches will quieter people maybe better at observing how people react to the speech and putting a presentation together. Of course, there are many shades of people who are somewhat introverted and somewhat extroverted or not introverted at all.
I suppose my point in writing is that we need to give our quite people in this world more recognition in our families, friendships, and jobs. It is easy for them to get lost behind all the noise of those extroverted people vying for position in front of them. But different kinds of people can have unique view points and are often passionate about their own individual niches in life.