100 Word Wednesday: Poem —FreeVerse —“Childhood Days Astray” #100WordWednesday #amwritingpoetry


Thanks to Bikurgurl for hosting #100WordWednesday.


Credit: Bikurgurl


Tears of glass splinter, threats exchanged

Paper walls structured, pretend accords signed,

I’m guilty, but I’m not alone —

I’ve learned to apologize when the stubborn refuse.

When their words of ire as fire singe,

Blacken each day with poison deranged.

Refusing to talk, barricaded in your fortress of white noise;

Pushing alliance ‘neath plush 1960 tree-green piles.

Values and assumptions, lumps and bumps,

Consider other perspectives, act beyond perceptions; no more spats without, “I’m sorry for every hurt.”

But we’ll pretend, and if I speak it, the truth doesn’t count.

Children never learn, it’s the adage that chokes you.

It’s never right to not forgive; it’s a flaw in us.

Your grudges are deep, and your reflections skewed,

Forgetting your words, a problem in a string of failures, things I can’t do.

So, you’ll impose and push, no comprehension of what’s suffered —

Boarders not to cross.

What can I do? It’s what you’ve instigated;

So, I kept myself hidden, avoided your target.

And still, we don’t deal in forgiveness, you never admit fault;

I hate you for it, because sorry heals a plenitude of wounds.

But for you it’s just a word, a paltry thing you won’t offer.

You crowd and yell, murmuring old woes, not peering past crumbs and specs;

The film catches, tulips budding now sputter,

The screen pauses, flickers and they fade.

Defective film clicks, cracked as hearts malnourished.

Every family unhappy, in a vicious cycle reacting to our childhood days.


©️Mandibelle16. (2018) All Rights Reserved.

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#NovemberNotes Day 21/Sunday Photo Fiction: The End of the Affair #amwriting #flashfiction


Thanks to Alistair Forbes for hosting SPF. I’m combining SPF with November Notes Prompt Day 21 “Great Escape” by Gavin James.


Credit: Alistair Forbes — A Mixed Bag


“Great Escape” by Gavin James


Giiselle shivered, slipping out of bed. It was 7:00 a.m. and Jimmy had been knocking on her front door for a half-an- hour. The knocking continued as she made a strong cup of Irish Breakfast tea. Stop! Just stop knocking, leave me alone!

The knocking ended and the long loud ringing of her doorbell commenced. Giselle swore, unlocking her front door and throwing the screen door open. “What the hell do you want? It’s 7:00 a.m. on a Saturday.”

Jimmy rolled his eyes. “You’re being rude. We need to talk about us, the way we were. Until we talk I can’t sleep, so why should I let you?”

Giselle grabbed her down coat and stepped outside. She zipped it up, burying her hands in her pockets. ” The good old days are gone, Jimmy. We’re not together. I don’t care if you can’t sleep.”

“Gigi, listen. What’s between us is more than attraction. I love you for real, always have.”

“We haven’t been together for a year. This isn’t some mistake we made that we can just laugh about someday. I was the other woman and you had a wife.”

Giselle polked Jimmy’s chest. “You decided to try to work things out with her; you chose Jasmine over me. Our affair was always a delicate game and now it’s over.”

Jimmy groaned, “You were my great escape at a dark time in my life. Jasmine divorced me months ago, I’m not married. We can start again.”

“We’ve been down this road before and I’m done. I forgive you but I can’t forget how much you hurt me.” He laid his hand on Giselle’s shoulder.

She turned gazing into his red-rimmed gray eyes. “You’re not the one for me, Jimmy. I was naive to think a married man like you ever was. It doesn’t matter that you’re divorced now.”


©Mandibelle16.(2017) All Rights Reserved.

November Notes: Poem – Day 27 – Laurenelle – “Both to Blame” #poetry #novembernotes #amwriting #music


Today’s prompt song is “The Night” by Black Lab

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“The Night” – Black Lab

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Credit: Jay Johansen Studio – Flickr Hive Mind

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Night calling and it bleeds with today’s pain, 

Your words, riddles linger, we’re both to blame;

Shower of diamonds, your words cut, blood rains.

It’s the anger you give me, my heart strains
To feel the comfort, the closeness, not this hate;

Can I forgive? Your inner monster reigns. 

He doesn’t hit; he’s inside you unsated
He’s your temper, you destroy us, words dwell

Lips sting abusive words, past ignites, lost faith. 

You think I won’t forgive; I’m your lover, a shell, 
I don’t want to live as Belle, trapped in prison. 

I know beast’s heart; goodness hidden in hell. 

This nightmare, sleeping alone, nothing given, 
Brought us down, broken paths, this our last night? 

You want sleep, you want peace — but I’m livid. 

I’m tired of the bore, this game playing, our fight, 
So I’ll wrap the sheet around you, I’m stupid

I care you’re warm, your sight gives me hope — light. 

My soul’s battered, yours is too, let’s erase —
Our problems; your eyes lift, I stroke your face. 

Night calling and it bleeds with today’s pain, 

Your words, riddles linger, we’re both to blame. 

——

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©Mandibelle16. (2016) All Rights Reserved. 

Three Line Tales: Pink Elephants #quotes #pinterest #3LineTales


Thanks to Sonya of Only 100 Words for hosting #3Linetales.

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Credit: Dimitri Popov from Unsplash

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1. “The Elephant In The Room. . . “

http://www.pinterest.com

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2. 

http://www.pinterest.com

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3. ——

http://www.pinterest.com

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©Mandibelle16. (2016) All Rights Reserved.

Poem: Alouette – “Head on My Lap”


The Alouette, created by Jan Turner, consists of two or more stanzas of 6 lines each, with the following set rules:

Meter: 5, 5, 7, 5, 5, 7
Rhyme Scheme: a, a, b, c, c, b

The form name is a French word meaning ‘skylark’ or larks that fly high, the association to the lark’s song being appropriate for the musical quality of this form. The word ‘alouette’ can also mean a children’s song (usually sung in a group), and although this poetry form is not necessarily for children’s poetry (but can be applied that way), it is reminiscent of that style of short lines. Preference for the meter accent is on the third syllable of each line (please see examples below).

Please visit Shadow Poetry for more information.


Man with Head on Woman's lap
http://www.pinterest.com

I worry for you,

My reasons see through,

No such opacity and —

You never look up,

Drinking coffee cup,

Living in your box of quick sand.


You won’t admit truth,

Reality isn’t proof,

What world do you inhabit?

Not ever seeing,

A blank lost being,

Following the white rabbit.


Life’s not Wonderland,

It’s not a game grande.

You need choose to be living,

Not a ghost fading.

A person jaded.

Wake-up, be aware, forgive.


We can’t live this life,

No passion or strife,

Dig-down in your belly, find —

Life’s fire hiding, soar —

Past limits, encore!

Joy, vibrance; be kind.


Love, you’re secluded;

Don’t live deluded.

You’re my everything, my fire.

Darkness you have found,

Devours you around.

Let us be flames who aspire.


Be not sad, life changes,

Alter our exchanges.

Talk, laugh; head placed on my lap,

Tell my your secrets.

All your woes, bleakness.

Let no thoughts keep your soul trapped.


©Mandibelle16. (2016) All Rights Reserved.

 

 

 

 

Poem: Wrapped Refrain –  “Relationships and Childhood” 


Thanks to The Daily Post for the prompt words Childhood, Sky, Purpose, and Angry.

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What made us now, this moment past

How’d we become so frail, like glass.

Feelings torn, mended, stitches —

Reopened, wounds our glitches.

Remembering yet, we’re sky high humans so lost.

Can we find, the purpose of us charred, at what cost?

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What is it to have faith, to believe?

Words your lips intone I perceive? 

See we only through the looking —

Glass; are reflections picture books, 

Children read us, seeing clearer, we’re angry and —

Getting madder; if only sky cleared, clouds not sad .

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Our faces to the little ones, 

Need appear smiling, not loathsome.

Bring back laughter, joy, and pleasure.

Find every day peace, time treasured.

So their childhood vision is happiness and light.

Through our faces, read clear, inner peace, delight.

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If in each other we peer past, 

The anger each possess and fast, 

Find paths through shadows dark and grim, 

Maybe, then we search beyond sin.

See the rain drop on cool skin, sliding, patterns desire.

Eyes are opened wide; blast of furnace, passion fires.

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Our own mystery of life we guard, 

Though life throw many dangers hard.

We prevail, faith our purpose and —

Each other’s love; though time stand —

Not still for anyone of us on earth, who’s living, 

What made us now, taught us in childhood to forgive.

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©Mandibelle16. (2016) All Rights Reserved.

Thanks for Making Me a Fighter


www.colourbox.com
http://www.colourbox.com

These past few weekends I have learned a skill I’m not so fond of. In fact, I have avoided this skill all my life. And if I’m truthful, I’ll admit that there is a second skill I’ve learned along with my first skill. The first skill I have learned is how to fight and go back to having a normal relationship with the other party afterwards and the second skill I’ve learned is how to apologize, especially when you’ve done something wrong or even if you haven’t.

In my family growing up — believe it or not — we didn’t fight much especially now, since we kids have become adults. When we do fight the fights are usually vicious and quickly forgotten. It is understood that there is an apology that isn’t said. It is understood that life just goes back to normal after the fight and we forgive each other and move on. It isn’t always that simple though. Sometimes arguments occur and there is left over feelings of anger or hurt. Sometimes the process of forgetting what was said in a fight takes time. It may take a few days but eventually life clicks back into place again and the world goes back to normal.

In romantic entanglements, I’m not so good at fighting. Because the truth is you can’t always just leave a fight without explanations and apologies. Often, explanations and apologizing are just what is needed in this situation especially if you are in a serious relationship. The deeper you get into a relationship the more hurt you can become. And sometimes you don’t realize it but another person who knows you well can read you better than you think if you’re confused about the relationship or have issues with something in the relationship. And sometimes either party can injure the other party in a moment of stupidity or by accident.

The truth I never learned about fighting is that fighting keeps you in line with another person. Fighting makes you feel alive. And making up after a fight can bring such closeness and kindness that it makes the fighting worth it. Fighting also makes the previously ” muddy waters”  between you and the person you are fighting with clear. It feels fantastic to be forgiven after fight, because you can feel such relief and thankfulness at being forgiven and starting anew with the other person.  Although, I think I never will like the actual fighting — I’m too much of a negotiator and compromiser —  I think that learning and having to deal with a less than easy playing field is healthy for you. It’s vital that we learn to get along with people and often that means bringing out are inner fighter, instead of always compromising. And other times that means saying your sorry whether you are  right or wrong.

Forgiveness and Moving On


When I was a little girl I forgave easily. I did not hold grudges like other little children did. Sure I fought back every once in awhile. I threw some books in John Zammits face and burst into tears when he wanted the same books I did in grade 1. I was 6 years old and I can’t say why but I really didn’t like the kid at times. I kicked Keisha, a girl in my grade 2 classes sister because she was so big, annoying, and ungirlish at the time. But generally, I was a good kid kid and good at forgiving people for what they did to me even though sometimes I was bullied. I suppose the other reason was that my parents told me if another kid ever bullied me kick them back. And I have to say that method of reasoning worked great for me.

But as I got older forgiveness became harder to give. Altercations were not just about silly little things anymore. Hurt was personal and deep. It wasn’t physical fighting but emotional and psychological battles that most girls played. Sometimes it was so hurtful I wished they really would have just tried to punch me because although I was gentle I was tough. Ignoring people was the best thing to do my parents told me. Thus after, girls who were my friends talked behind my back, called me names, but I knew they were just jealous of something – I just ignored them and the mind games stopped.

Harder than that was the high school type bulling I experienced in University. Suddenly, some uber good looking guy liked me and sparks flew between our eyes. Girl’s I never knew were calling me Bitch in the bathroom. Guys who would talk about the situation loudly as you walked by did not like to be ignored. Everyone thought I was some Bitch and would say it as I passed by, people I’d never even met. I had no clue what the guy I liked thought or why he never defended me. Eventually I resented him and I think forgiving him for not caring enough to defend me and spend time talking with me as he waved and winked at me and played games while breaking my still teenaged heart was something that took me a long time to forgive. Something for some reason that really ticks me off even today 7 or so years later. I have moved on with my life but a little part of me is still angry at the guy and his friends.

Now today at 28 I think forgiveness feels almost impossible at times. But it’s really important. One thing that makes Christianity really unique from other religions is the forgiveness Christians are supposed to show to other people. Jesus advocated the ‘ turn the other cheek’ policy meaning let the person hurt you all they want just be forgiving. Is this not impossible? But if you think about it makes more sense than all the hurt caused by vengeance and getting back at people. It makes more sense than countries at war over land stolen hundreds of years ago. It makes more sense than the high cost of casualties because someone couldn’t walk away from a situation and forgive.

I don’t know about you but I have pride, but letting someone just abuse you and ignoring them or even standing up for yourself non-violently is tough. People just instinctively hurt one another. Maybe some of us are to cold and maybe others of us are insensitive but I think it’s a really valuable lesson: forgive each other. Maybe you don’t forget but you move on – forgiveness allows you to do that. To leave a hurtful part of your life behind and go on. Even if you just pretend to forgive until it becomes true I think that’s something to be proud of such as forgiving someone who broke your heart or maybe accidentally hurt you really bad in a car accident. I just think if people could forgive each other as much as they could, what a better place we’d live in. But perhaps, this like all things wrong with the world is impossible. But that I suppose, is up to you and I.