Retreat


What’s my reason to appease him?
He is only human but inside him lies a heart that beats
Even as my own cries against him “retreat.”
I couldn’t tell you the reason for it, better then I could tell him.
Billy Joel sang, ” She’ll do as she pleases, she’s nobodies fool.”
And ” She can’t be convicted she’s earned her degree.”
To describe that a woman’s reasons are purely her own.
I need please no one…

But I can’t convince him to stop loving me, I might break him and I’d be responsible.
He’s fighting for us, but I don’t see why he fights for a girl who has ran again and again.
I don’t think it’s a good idea, but he’s pulling me in spiced words on his lips
“This could be our future, I have made these plans.”
But what am I losing if I give in.
The heart of rebellion speaks freely through me:
” I am a woman and I’ll state my case, I came when I wanted, I’ll leave when I choose, if you see me again it’s my liberty I’ll lose.”
But he travels where he wishes in paths with his voice, telling me all things that I should want to hear.
He is fighting for love, I’m fighting to forget, I’m fighting to get loose, I’m fighting a threat?
Set me free into the sunset that I might choose my own happy ending.

I could go on if I wish, and leave things as they always are
I could be grateful that some guy chose to love me at all.
But he doesn’t see it, and he doesn’t get it, what good is his love if I don’t return it.
There are many kinds of love and he doesn’t see the frailty of ours,
Well I’m not sure it’s so thick, I think it might be plastic —
And you can’t tell me my intuition is off, love isn’t all you need.
And I could be free to start from scratch build my own life, or I could be trapped
But he won’t give in, he just doesn’t get it.
I’ve moved down the path and I’m in the rabbit hole, If I come out now I could get foxed.
I just need a lot of time to think. I just need time away
Maybe then I’ll go shooting black, but maybe I just need time to grow and become the person I need to become – more then nice, a falcon with beating wings of black to fly, with talons to let go and rip a part, and rapid cold eye to see wisdom and what it provides.

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