For NaPoWriMo Day 26, my own poem from a few weeks back.
Credit: Bruce Mars via Unsplash.
I am weakest (so you say),
That is when your strength defines me.
When I’m meekest and I ache and hurt,
When everyday problems snowball, regular sickness amplifies.
When I was used to doing whatever,
More than I’ve been in a long time ever.
Now, I fall into the pit,
Can’t reach out, the water swallows.
Double-hurt, such a good day then —
Did I overdo it?
I tried, to make a goal; to do just that.
It’s hot, hazy, beautiful outside,
But, the sunshine’s too bright,
Cars revving, pumping music; my ears pulse, some pain.
Am I an older person, in a 30-some body?
I try to be positive, today I cannot.
But I suppose, I must take time to heal,
That little flares, must be sealed to avoid a violent storm.
The process slow and agonizing, but I wait for tomorrow’s fun.
I wait, and I know not for what —
To be at that place where I can be independent,
Help more people and forget the ache — rocky roads tripping, ankle snapping,
Yesterday was as lost as today.
Now, I’m upset that I couldn’t do what I set out to do.
Oh, the plans of mice and men they say.
They’re rather meaningless in the scheme of things;
When health is mostly everything, because it connects to so much more;
And what was once given, is now, lost.
But, I will smile anyways;
I will push beyond these cracks and snarls in the dark.
I’ll find the suns jewels even if it’s an eternity spent aching to smile,
To return to a world of vivacious delight, despite.
©️Mandibelle16. (2019) All Rights Reserved.