Sunday Photo Fiction: Not Just Allergies #amwriting #flashfiction #writing 


Thanks to Alistair Forbes for hosting SPF. 

—–

A Mixed Bag

——-

Ginnie and Keegan gazed out across the city far away from the mountainous hill they had climbed. 

“I’m exhausted. I don’t know how I’ll ever get down from here,” Ginnie mumbled, trying to catch her breath. 

Keegan smiled. “This was only a two-day hike? How are you ever going to do the West Coast Trail? There’s so much climbing involved in that one. We’ve got to train more.” 

“Seriously Keegan, I told you I’m not into hiking that much. I can barely breathe as it is. It’s not only that I’m out of shape; it’s difficult with allergies, inhaling grass, pollen, and fungi.” 

Keegan laughed, “What about your inhaler? Did you take your allergy medication?” 

“Yeah, I’ve used them both. I know you don’t get it but often my throats feels constricted.”

“Are you having troubles breathing?” Keegan asked worriedly. 

“I’m fine. It’ll be okay if we have lunch and rest. Hey what’s that?” 

Behind them a great cloud had mushroomed up in the sky from the city miles away. A great whooshing sound could be heard echoing from down in the valley. Even far away, sirens could be heard.

Ginnie started to cough and wheeze and Keegan patted her back, “Breathe babe, breathe.” 

But then Keegan himself was having trouble breathing. A putrid smell was in the air. He peered at Ginnie almost unconscious beside him as they both fell to the ground. 

Keegan reached for Ginnie’s hand and then he began to cough. Before he collapsed he muttered, “I think this is chemical warfare, or worse.” 

Both Keegan and Ginnie lay still. 

——

©Mandibelle16. (2016) All Rights Reserved. 

29 thoughts on “Sunday Photo Fiction: Not Just Allergies #amwriting #flashfiction #writing 

  1. Iain Kelly November 22, 2016 / 10:21 pm

    Shocking tale, expertly told and a timely warning in certain parts of the world today. Well done.

    Liked by 2 people

    • mandibelle16 November 22, 2016 / 10:41 pm

      Thank you Ian. I’m happy you enjoyed it 🙂 Yes it could be too true in certain places.

      Liked by 1 person

  2. Yinglan November 22, 2016 / 10:32 pm

    That’s so unfortunate of them. Nicely told of a tale of being in the wrong place at the wrong time.

    Liked by 1 person

    • mandibelle16 November 22, 2016 / 10:40 pm

      Thanks Yinglan. I couldn’t think of something positive for this picture lol.

      Liked by 1 person

      • Yinglan November 22, 2016 / 10:43 pm

        Haha, me neither. 😀 Nothing is ever good when there’s a mushroom cloud in the sky.

        Liked by 1 person

  3. Irene Waters 19 Writer Memoirist November 22, 2016 / 10:54 pm

    A poignant tale. I had hoped they were far enough from the cloud but not to be. You achieved a feeling of tension in me with just the asthma attack, let alone the end of the world. Well done.

    Liked by 1 person

    • mandibelle16 November 23, 2016 / 1:46 am

      Thank you Irene. I’m happy you felt that. Yes allergies/asthma definitely no fun

      Liked by 1 person

  4. Joy Pixley November 23, 2016 / 12:00 am

    What an awful thing to witness, and awful to experience too! I can see why you went dark with this picture. I had a story idea in mind that actually wasn’t that depressing but ran out of time to write it… 😦

    Liked by 1 person

  5. michnavs November 23, 2016 / 3:24 am

    i didn’t see the ending coming that way.. but that’s what i love about your stories

    Liked by 1 person

    • mandibelle16 November 23, 2016 / 4:04 am

      Hehe. Thanks so much. I wish they would’ve lived but you can’t really contain weapons that have chemical effects on the body once they’re airborne.

      Like

    • mandibelle16 November 23, 2016 / 5:32 pm

      Thanks Rosema. I don’t think they do. Chemical weapons are too difficult to contain, they spread in the air and for many miles. Thank you reading.

      Like

  6. swritings November 23, 2016 / 10:11 am

    War really can be waged in evil ways. Very intense! Great take! ☺

    Liked by 1 person

  7. Sunday Fiction November 23, 2016 / 12:31 pm

    My first thought was “well, that’s her allergies sorted” lol. A very good tale on the suddenness of a chemical attack and how little time there is to survive it.

    Liked by 1 person

  8. Copper Cranes November 24, 2016 / 1:38 am

    Amanda, “Not Just Allergies” took me by surprise, great flash fiction. I wasn’t expecting such a tragic ending, wonderful writing, and terrific dialogue. This really could be home town, Anywhere. Wishing you a great evening, enjoy the rest of your week, take care. ~ Mia 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    • mandibelle16 November 24, 2016 / 3:09 am

      Hi Mia. Thanks for the comment. Yes I think the surprising ending works. Chemicals would be in the air so it would travel even far away. I think that’s the scary thing that it could be a small town anywhere. Thanks for your comments. I have a piece of yours I’m looking to comment on when my concentration is a bit clearer 🙂 Have a great Thursday!

      Liked by 1 person

      • Copper Cranes November 24, 2016 / 3:46 am

        Hi Amanda, you’re very welcome. So true, when they measure how far chemicals travel it’s frightening. (You’re so kind, please don’t give it a second thought, take care of yourself.) Thank you for the Thursday wishes, you too. 🙂

        Liked by 1 person

  9. patriciaruthsusan November 27, 2016 / 10:04 am

    It’s horrible when chemical weapons are used. All weapons are bad, but chemicals are the worst. This was a scary story. Good writing, Mandi. —- Suzanne

    Like

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