Poem: Double Octain – “Emerald Stare” #amwriting #poetry


The Octain, full name Octain Refrain, is a form of poetry developed by English poet Luke Prater in December 2010. 
It comprises eight lines as two tercets and a couplet, either as octosyllables (counting eight syllables per line), or as iambic tetrameter, whichever is preferable. Trochaic tetrameter also acceptable. 

The latter yields a more propulsive rhythm, as opposed to iambs, which lilt. As the name suggests, the first line is a refrain, repeated as the last (some variation of refrain acceptable). Rhyme-scheme as follows – 

A -b – b

a-c/c – a

b-A

A is the refrain

c/c is a midline internal rhyme.

A High Octain or Double Octain is simply two Octains in one poem with a rhyme scheme of:

A – b – b – a – c/c – a – b – A 

A – b – b – a – d/d – a – b – A

I’m doing a high Octain. Octains are usually done in 8 syllables. 

Please see Shadow Poetry for more information.

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http://www.gettyimages.ca

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Brilliant green eyes with emerald stare, 

Searching deep; dives into your core,

She claims to know; and she explores.

Waterfalls crashing with new cares, 

The freshness of water, cooling.

She swims yet, eyes magic jewels.

Floating near falls; bodies bare.

Perfection in the water’s deep roar, 

Brilliant green eyes with emerald stare.

———–

Brilliant green eyes with emerald stare. 

She touches your face, within she wars.

Trying to help your soul, her’s sore —

Bruises;  her magic thoughts entail, 

Implore you, see beyond heart torn, 

Surge forward; don’t think of her worn.

You swim near, she begs you, don’t dare, 

Forget her, this place, waterfalls pour, 

Brilliant green eyes with emerald stare.

——-

©Mandibelle16. (2016) All Rights Reserved.

8 thoughts on “Poem: Double Octain – “Emerald Stare” #amwriting #poetry

  1. moonskittles June 3, 2016 / 12:04 am

    A beautiful Octain. I want those eyes to look at me too 🙂
    ❤ D

    Liked by 1 person

  2. clcouch123 June 3, 2016 / 3:51 am

    “Emerald Stare” is not only a captivating title but also a kind of refrain, one that invites further consideration each time it’s given. Folk stare for different reasons. Out of interest, hoping not to be stared at and through. Intense curiosity, certainly. Or simply because that’s how someone’s been fashioned–to have wide (green) eyes that look widely at the world. Thanks for creating this striking series of sights, actions, and reflections.

    Liked by 1 person

    • mandibelle16 June 3, 2016 / 4:45 am

      Thanks for reading and commenting Christopher, Always appreciated. The form of poetry includes a refrain at the beginning and end of each stanza.

      Like

  3. jademwong June 3, 2016 / 6:45 pm

    Wow! The rhyme scheme is on-point and I love the phrase Emerald Stare. Breathtaking, Mandi.

    Liked by 1 person

    • mandibelle16 June 3, 2016 / 8:37 pm

      Thanks Jade. Happy you liked the form 🙂 I’m looking forward to trying it some more. Have a wonderful weekend.

      Liked by 1 person

      • jademwong June 4, 2016 / 1:17 am

        It sounds like a tricky form but produces some very beautiful poetry. You have a great weekend too Mandi! 🙂

        Liked by 1 person

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