Poem: Free Verse – “Her Hair Is Falling Out”


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——-

I felt it slice through my heart, 

The sharpened blade of a knife, blood spurting.

When she said her hair was falling out, 

It made it all too real.

I felt pierced by a sword, 

Blood draining from my face,

Collapsing from a wound brand new,

I wish I knew how she handled it.

Could face the world with such grace,

I tried to put myself in her shoes,

To keep it about her.

But if she is anything like me,

The loss of blond locks would be gory,

An image of c#%€£r, to be detested and banished.

But reality spears through the aching heart,

She handles all with fierce fire.

—–

But when she said “my hair is falling out,”

My eyes filled with salt water, 

Channels of tears went down pasty cheeks, 

Off skin prepared for the night; I lost it.

In her pictures, she appears happy, like herself,

Handling each trial, each challenge with a smile.

But when she wrote “we’re going wig shopping,”

The tears wouldn’t stop.

And the pain in my stomach is a giant knot.

I’m scared to release that pent up rage, 

At God for allowing her to find out four stages in, 

With a two-year-old and loving husband of only a few years.

She’s living life —

But I ache for her and I pray,

Because I know there is no other way.

Let God heal the c#%*£rous growths.

Let her be healthy, let us grow old as friends.

Let her baby have his Mother.

——-

I think it’s an issue of vanity,

A woman’s hair, her crowning glory,

But my friend’s beauty goes beyond her features,

Beyond skin deep, 

Yet I weep while she smiles,

Picturing her hair at her feet.

Her new wig on her head,

Being prepared for when,

She loses all of her hair.

But yet she finds the strength to keep fighting.

Without blond hair to shield the struggle behind.

Without one of her most defining features,

She loosing her hair with such fortitude.

My friend does not cry,

She smiles with eloquence, 

Handles her fight with class.

But I weep and I weep.

In my dreams, I cry for her, 

For her I’m so afraid of losing,

When we’ve both only begun life’s journey.

She’s come this far,

In prayer and empathy, 

I cheer her battle on.

—–

©Mandibelle16. (2016) All Rights Reserved.

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46 thoughts on “Poem: Free Verse – “Her Hair Is Falling Out””

    1. Honestly I agree. I was okay until she posted about losing her hair. She has this beautiful white/blond hair and could pretty much be a model. She is vibrant and outgoing. Fun and always the Center of attention. When I read her hair was coming out and she went to buy wigs with her Mom, it really hit me that one of my best friends for like 10 years is extremely ill. And yes, she deals so well. Thanks for your comments.

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    1. Thanks PJ. It is a sad and difficult situation. I think my friend handles it well, from what I see. She’s a fighter and has a little guy she wants to see grow up. Seeing her post about losing her hair and buying wigs, really made it painfully real for me. I can only imagine what she feelsand empathize with her on her journey. She is quite busy btw her son/husband/family and treatment and though I would like to see her right away, it’s not happening right now. But last night, I picked out some beautiful Gerber daisies and roses, a flower arrangement to be sent to her. Sometimes just knowing people are thinking about you in a tangible way helps (I hope!) Thanks for your thoughts PJ.

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      1. You are a sweet friend, Mandi! I’m sure she loved receiving the beautiful flowers. You are right. Sometimes it helps just knowing that people love and care about you and are thinking about you.

        Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks for reading and commenting. I’m so sorry for your friend. I hate ca$&?r. One of my best friends is fighting stage 4 breast cancer since last summer. She had a lump on her breast for 18 months before, the doctor kept saying it was nothing. Meanwhile in that time she had her little boy and when they finally diagnosed her with breast cancer it was stage 2. Two weeks later, they told her stage 4. She’s chosen to fight it in more natural method in TJ Mexico. She gets Chemo but small doses and vitamins along with other things she does. So afraid for her, she’s only 30 yrs old and I want her little guy to have a Mom as he grows up.

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      1. What a tragic situation after 18 months of being told it was nothing!? My friend is the same…stage 4 and going through brutal treatment (both from chemo, radiation and the medical community!). Everyone must be their own health care advocate, as I can’t believe what I have witnessed alongside her in the last two years with these physicians/cancer centers. The holistic or natural methods seem much less barbaric than the chemo. I wish your friend the best… she’s so young and her son needs his Mama.

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  1. OH Mandi!! So sorry about your friend!! This poem is written so well, so emotional, can tell it comes from the heart! Prayers for your friend and for you as you walk this journey with her. Hugs and love!

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Mandi,
    This broke my heart, yet gave me courage and appreciation. What a painful story to share, and at the same time celebrate.
    Blessings to her and you!
    D,

    Liked by 1 person

  3. This is so powerful, I can almost touch your pain and sorrow, but as someone who has gone through difficult health and family situations, I think you might find that by the time she told you about losing her hair, she had already done her crying and was now in action mode, preparing for what was ahead, making plans for how to deal with it and for her family. She had probably already moved on. It is hard to stand by and watch when those close to us struggle, we feel helpless, but we aren’t. Just being a friend and stepping in with practical help when needed is more than enough. When serious illness strikes, many ‘friends’ step away, unable to cope or commit to long-term support, moral or practical, you are still there. And so is she. I send you both a supportive virtual hug.

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    1. Thank you, yes I’m sure she has done her crying and come to terms. Finding out she was actually losing get a lot just made her illness for me, very real. But she is as I wrote, courageous and positive despite. And the wig she chose looks awesome on her, although I hear it is uncomfortable in heat. Not to mention, I did not know it hurt losing your hair 😦 Thank you for the hugs. I appreciate it so much. 🌷

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  4. This is heartbreaking. I can feel you, and your empathy and your pain through your words. But she is a woman of courage. She lost her hair, her beautiful hair, but she can still smile.
    I will pray for you and for her.
    *hugs*

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  5. I’m sorry for your friend and her family but also for you. I pray your friend pulls through, I watched my best friend go through c*@c*r as well, it’s never easy for anyone. She’s lucky to have you as such a great friend.

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    1. Oh I’m sort didn’t mean to make you cry. But you’re not alone. When I found out her hair was falling out I cried too. It made my friend’s illness very real suddenly. I’m happy you liked the poem anyways. Thanks for commenting.

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      1. One of my friends has leukemia and I didn’t realize it until she stopped coming to class and posted a picture of her shaved head, a month later.

        Oh my, it hit me real hard.

        Liked by 1 person

      2. I’m sorry to hear that. That must have been really difficult to find out she had c#%*+r that way. Prayers for your friend and you. My friend has a FB group giving updates. Her update on her hair was difficult. Knowing she had the disease and seeing her relatively the same except a bit thinner and a port for IV treatments in her chest, didn’t seem to hit so bad when I saw her at her birthday. But the hair. . . Every girl loves her hair. It’s why women at the hair salon cry when a hairdresser accidentally cuts too many inches off. She says the wig is hot, like a toque. And I never knew this but I guess having your hair fall-out hurts 😦 I pray both our friends go into remission permanently and sooner rather then later. 🙏🏻💗🌺

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    1. Aw, I’m sorry you cried. She is absolutely an amazing woman. I have no doubt she will beat this awful disease. Thank you so much for the thoughts and prayers, they are always appreciated. Also, thank you for the follow 🙂

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      1. It wasn’t a bad thing that I cried…it just means that I can feel the emotion you wrote with! And you’re welcome 🙂

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  6. Mandi, this is a very sad, but beautifully written poem. You have described the experience so well and the emotion really speaks loud when reading it. I pray for her and her family. Having to endure the treatment is difficult enough, but to lose your hair is also very devastating.

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    1. Thank you Jessie especially for your prayers. She is doing okay having picked out a wonderful wig that unless you know, you cannot tell it’s not her hair. Happy you liked the poem, it hit me hard when she lost her hair. She seems to deal with things well and is optimistic, although I’m sure she has her moments.

      She has opted for a more naturalistic kind of cancer treatment in TJ Mexico. She gets IVs of vitamins as well as smaller doses of chimo, partly from a poisonus flower of somekind. She was doing well, it got a bit worse, then they had to step up the treatment and she lost her hair. But it seems as if her 3 month stint having more chimo and vitamins and other cancer treatments is helping. Thank you again.

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