Poem: Tonight


There is no where to go; when you can only say ‘no.’And look down the street knowing you’ll never go that way.

When a desire to say ‘yes’ leaves quietly, and hides in the chamber of the soul. I think too much and write to pour, misery into the air, to see it dissipate. 

Come out tonight, it use to be my delight; now I can’t even drink wine alone, without the proper wine opener.

And I’d be glad to spend some time among friends; but life now has a harsher bent. And living feels so alone. 

It would deplete me to go out, for just an hour or two; the minute I can’t handle it  I start to feel sick.

The moon is in the sky, a lunar delight; it covers my tears, and holds my fears. And it is my ill, the night. 

The stars sparkle vividly; they’re bright spots of joy. But I haven’t seen them, it’s been far too long.

Fire in the nightmare sky, in the breeze, in the house; fire yearns to build up and burn through everything. 

But kept in quiet places, fire can only heat the coals of a life, lost before, it was ever born. It simmers out to ash. 

Unravel life, it’s too complicated, to fix my soul, to fix my body; I’m thirty-years-old tired and worn. 

So, if stay at home again tonight. While the world is alive and I’m still as twilight. I will not mourn, it was never my night.

I’m not the same as I was before, times have changed and barely do I see the sky in blinding starlight.

I’m use to indoor lights that flick off and say goodnight, sleep well, or suffer more.

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