Prompt: Secret – one word prompt.
Why do people have trouble keeping secrets I wonder? We all have some, big or little secrets. My Mom would always say when I was younger things like: “Amanda needs to go to Kingsway” then to me ” don’t tell your Dad I went shopping.” Or she would tell me to hide the evidence of fast food when we would bring it home every once in awhile before my Dad came home. Those were tiny secrets between us.
My Dad still does this too. He will say to my Grandma, “Amanda is tired and needs to go home now” when we visit. What he means was that he wanted to go home because he was tired. I’d roll my eyes at this secret.
When I was in University two of my best friends liked the same guy, we’ll call him James. One of them started going out with James and the other would talk all about him. I hated being in the middle of this drama. It wasn’t fair to me or my other two best friends and finally the friend going out with James told the girl who liked him. She was mad at me especially because we had been friends since high school. But I was close friends with the other girl too, so I didn’t think it was fair of her to be mad at me and not my other two friends. For awhile the friend who only liked James wouldn’t talk to me. But once the friend who was dating James became engaged to him, my friend who liked James realized her error. Funny enough, the friend who became engaged to James didn’t end up marrying him. It was such a big secret at the time, this drama I felt trapped by; but now I don’t think it’s as big as I thought it was. But to tell you the truth I’m not as close of friends with the friend from high school, but the friend who didn’t marry the guy she was engaged to, is still a close friend.
Secrets are such funny things. We feel so desperate to keep them at the time, then realize it wasn’t so bad to have that secret told whether they are large or small secrets. But then there are things you never tell, no matter how long it’s been. I never told my Mom how much I actually drank when my parents had to pick me up from a pubcrawl. I said twelve high balls in two hours, it was more like eighteen high balls and half a bottle of root beer schnapps. But I was twenty-one and could handle the one day hangover. Today I’m not much of a drinker, just some wine on the weekend of a couple of drinks. But I still think my Mom would be horrified of the amount. I’m sure my Dad had more of an idea, but he never said a thing.
Secrets are strange. They can be really funny, when you wondered how can your friend like such and such a guy, what does she see? Or, that the person you were seeing and broke up with, your friends never liked. Or secrets of self-sabotage, you can see someone messing their life up the same way over and over again. But you can’t really say anything, because you don’t want to hurt their feelings. I’ve had experience with that. Sometimes you have to let people make their mistakes until they realize what they are doing. Telling them the truth can end friendships or at least add distance to them.
I have a few secrets, but I don’t like to tell, too many people have opinions. And like I said, those can be dangerous.