Flash Fiction For Aspiring Writers – Part II Our House: The Creepy Clown Funhouse


At gunpoint, Vanessa and Theo are led through an abandoned Circus theme park.

Oh God, I hate clowns.This place is so creepy, can’t you just let us go? We’ll never say anything about you.

Do you have to keep aiming that gun at the back of my head. We get it you’re in control. Vanessa and I understand.

I use to have nightmares about clowns Theo. Dear God, they scare me. Please, (Vanessa says looking imploringly at the gunmen) Let us go. Vanessa starts to cry.

The gunman and his two burly buddies take Vanessa and Theo into the fun house. They are separated and placed in a room full of distorted mirrors with the giant picture of a clown on the wall. They call for one another but Vanessa and Theo are tied up.

Vanessa, where are you?

Theo…

Suddenly, the face of the clown seen through all the distorted mirrors begins to move. He climbs out of the wall (now the size of a human) with a knife in his hand and laughs maniacally.

Creepy Clown Funhouse

Creepy Clown

Word Count: 176 words

Thanks to Priceless Joy for Hosting!

https://flashfictionforaspiringwriters.wordpress.com/2015/03/30/fffaw-week-of-04-01-2015/

24 thoughts on “Flash Fiction For Aspiring Writers – Part II Our House: The Creepy Clown Funhouse

  1. Nortina S. March 31, 2015 / 6:11 pm

    You had me captured at the first line. This story was intense! Great job!

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Priceless Joy March 31, 2015 / 9:20 pm

    Very good Mandi! You got those emotions through very well and I felt the tension when the clown came out of the wall!

    Liked by 1 person

  3. joyroses13 April 1, 2015 / 4:29 am

    OH MY!! Gives me chills, written very well, I could feel Vanessa’s fright, please quick get them away from the clown!

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Creatopath April 1, 2015 / 5:43 am

    The first sentence drew me in straight away and I loved the ending. Creepy!

    Like

  5. Sonya April 1, 2015 / 11:40 am

    Yep, that sounds like a nightmare alright… Good job!

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Francesca Smith April 1, 2015 / 8:04 pm

    This is a very gripping story!

    Liked by 1 person

  7. izzy-grabs-life April 2, 2015 / 4:10 pm

    Vanessa and Theo are so difficult and relentless with their nagging. XD I couldn’t stop laughing (even though I felt bad for them). Well, that was until the clown came out with a knife. WHY? Why is this happening? Is it a sport or a way of passing time for these maniacs? I must find out. Thanks for the entertaining read.

    Liked by 1 person

  8. milliethom April 2, 2015 / 6:24 pm

    You put across Vanessa’s great fear of clowns very well and build the scene up to that last couple of sentences. Just what are these clowns up to? Well done with the cliffhanger. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    • mandibelle16 April 2, 2015 / 7:07 pm

      Thanks. Honestly, the clowns creep me out I couldn’t think of writing it any other way lol

      Like

  9. married2arod April 3, 2015 / 4:10 am

    Well, that was pretty creepy. Enjoyed the story. The only thing confusing to me was the different formats for dialogue. Usually when I read italics it’s to describe internal thoughts, so at first I thought Vanessa’s dialogue were thoughts.

    Liked by 1 person

  10. afairymind April 3, 2015 / 9:06 am

    That was very creepy! You portray Vanessa’s fear really well. Great story. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  11. lrod1726 April 7, 2015 / 6:58 am

    Very creepy but it fit perfectly with the photos, great job! 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

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