Poetry – Disappointment


If you could feel a quiver of what I feel,
You wouldn’t feel anything at all, there’s a numbness it’s spreading like quicksilver.
And there is wonder as I question why I keep letting you back in to break the newness, the vitality, the stability I have gained while you were away.
And I wonder what I’m feeling now because it’s a strange ice cold feeling akin to fear.
This numbness is humbling and it’s showing me, you say you’ll change, but your actions show differently.
And I’m not willing to put up with your fumbling anymore, I know what I need.
Maybe it’s time you grow up little boy before the end of your nose grows Pinocchio.
Time to stop the cycle and fess up. We’ve been here a long long time and we still sit as still as cats waiting to pounce on their prey, but you never pounce — where’s your bounce?
Where does a relationship fit into all your plans, why can’t you just tell them to me?
Have pity, I’m exhausted pulling the wool from your eyes, I’m to tired to put together the puzzles you would have me fit together.
And the voice of a future drowns, gurgling as you chew your food down.
I’m still numb to everything. I thought you learned.
Silly child that is me, don’t you know men don’t change their always little boys at heart.
Silly girl, life’s a game, and your losing at this game of thrones.
You might get to sit on a stool and quietly contemplate better days or dream of days when birds had wings and eagles flew us over banks and rows, casting rapid eye and talons as claws, and gently lifting up those of us that fell.
A muted caw saying, ” I understand all.”

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